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Edmonds Scanner

@edmondsscanner.bsky.social

Be kind and stay weird. Contributor to: @sorrowscopes.bsky.social @riversidecasino.bsky.social

8,169 Followers  |  832 Following  |  3,970 Posts  |  Joined: 22.06.2023
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Posts by Edmonds Scanner (@edmondsscanner.bsky.social)

What’s your late winter look?

1. haunted cottage witch
2. cozy tea goblin
3. bleary eyed night owl
4. shambling darkness

08.03.2026 22:45 β€” πŸ‘ 63    πŸ” 11    πŸ’¬ 7    πŸ“Œ 9

I hope you have a nice night.
I hope your home is filled with books, tea, and cozy warmth.
I hope the ancient witch-lights always guide you there, or even deeper into the faerie realm, whichever you prefer.

09.03.2026 02:45 β€” πŸ‘ 85    πŸ” 23    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 1

What’s your late winter look?

1. haunted cottage witch
2. cozy tea goblin
3. bleary eyed night owl
4. shambling darkness

08.03.2026 22:45 β€” πŸ‘ 63    πŸ” 11    πŸ’¬ 7    πŸ“Œ 9

Daylight Saving Time is a myth.
Tell your boss the only rhythms you respond to are the eternal ebb and flow of the sea and the sleep cycles of the ancient creatures that slumber in the deep and dark places of the world.

08.03.2026 19:17 β€” πŸ‘ 124    πŸ” 36    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 3

Your daily affirmation:
You can be anything you want to be, including one of the ancient cosmic horrors who slumber inside stars, wrapped in tentacles and dreams.

08.02.2026 17:01 β€” πŸ‘ 84    πŸ” 21    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 4
audio cassettes in a wooden frame

audio cassettes in a wooden frame

It's all about perspective.

08.03.2026 16:37 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Time has no meaning and clocks aren't real.
Cast aside these notions and your human form.
Become one with the fog that flows through the forest, and become both old and new again, forever.
Or have some tea.

08.03.2026 16:35 β€” πŸ‘ 93    πŸ” 33    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 1
Preview
a cartoon drawing of a green goblin with orange eyes and teeth Alt: a cartoon drawing of a green goblin with orange eyes and teeth

I would never...

08.03.2026 04:19 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0
a yellow dock floats on a blue lake with a blue shadowed hill behind it

a yellow dock floats on a blue lake with a blue shadowed hill behind it

Dream of peace, and maybe someday we'll find it.

08.03.2026 04:00 β€” πŸ‘ 69    πŸ” 7    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 1
a sparkly pink sign that says Goblet Toss Everyone's A Winner at the Redondo Beach Pier

a sparkly pink sign that says Goblet Toss Everyone's A Winner at the Redondo Beach Pier

Feeling lucky?

08.03.2026 03:17 β€” πŸ‘ 36    πŸ” 3    πŸ’¬ 4    πŸ“Œ 1
Two panel comic. The top panel shows a pink triceratops with a speech bubble that says, β€œNew month, new me!” The bottom panel shows the triceratops walking to the right, oblivious to imminent doom caused by the meteor, volcano, and fire in the background. Two dinosaurs in the background look up at the meteor with worried expressions.

Two panel comic. The top panel shows a pink triceratops with a speech bubble that says, β€œNew month, new me!” The bottom panel shows the triceratops walking to the right, oblivious to imminent doom caused by the meteor, volcano, and fire in the background. Two dinosaurs in the background look up at the meteor with worried expressions.

At the start of every month I think, β€œI’m going to make more art and post more!” Here’s a comic to express how I feel about trying to be creative these days.

07.03.2026 18:41 β€” πŸ‘ 284    πŸ” 84    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 2

What's your favorite body of water?

1. stormy sea
2. babbling brook
3. murky forest pond
4. monster filled lake

07.03.2026 03:02 β€” πŸ‘ 68    πŸ” 11    πŸ’¬ 22    πŸ“Œ 19

Things that are gained with age:
- wisdom
- decreasing vanity
- increasing ennui
- invisibility from young adults
- mossy exterior
- talons for rending
- the desire to retire to a crumbling castle on the coast, and live with chatty ghosts

10.08.2025 19:55 β€” πŸ‘ 318    πŸ” 92    πŸ’¬ 6    πŸ“Œ 4

You know what they say: A dagger a day keeps most people away.

09.02.2026 20:30 β€” πŸ‘ 64    πŸ” 7    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 1

Travel is a good way to expand your mind.
It's also a good way to find portals to other worlds hidden behind bookshelves, and collectible goblin bones in the old forest.

07.03.2026 20:03 β€” πŸ‘ 68    πŸ” 12    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Universal Basic Income would be nice.
But what about Universal Basic Mossy Haunted Cottage By The Lake, and shelves overflowing with books, exotic teas, and curious bones collected from the forest?

09.02.2026 23:12 β€” πŸ‘ 150    πŸ” 38    πŸ’¬ 5    πŸ“Œ 6

Your daily affirmation:
Success is usually a series of failures, so get out there and fail your best.

07.03.2026 17:03 β€” πŸ‘ 45    πŸ” 8    πŸ’¬ 4    πŸ“Œ 0
Two scientists walk through a cluttered old-fashioned science laboratory.

The female scientist says 
β€œAnalogue instruments! Paper records! Chalk boards! I thought you'd agreed to modernise the laboratory?”

The male scientist replies
β€œThat's what i'm so excited about: we have moved to cloud-based storage for our data!”

They step out onto a balcony. She says:
β€œPlease tell me you haven't built a library zeppelin” 

This is exactly what he has done. It floats across the sky and he adds
β€œIt's got a fax machine!”

Two scientists walk through a cluttered old-fashioned science laboratory. The female scientist says β€œAnalogue instruments! Paper records! Chalk boards! I thought you'd agreed to modernise the laboratory?” The male scientist replies β€œThat's what i'm so excited about: we have moved to cloud-based storage for our data!” They step out onto a balcony. She says: β€œPlease tell me you haven't built a library zeppelin” This is exactly what he has done. It floats across the sky and he adds β€œIt's got a fax machine!”

My cartoon for this week’s @newscientist.com

07.03.2026 15:07 β€” πŸ‘ 1300    πŸ” 431    πŸ’¬ 19    πŸ“Œ 38
Preview
a cartoon drawing of a red panda reading a book in front of a fireplace Alt: a cartoon drawing of a red panda reading a book in front of a fireplace

We prefer to be warm.

07.03.2026 05:33 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

What's your favorite body of water?

1. stormy sea
2. babbling brook
3. murky forest pond
4. monster filled lake

07.03.2026 03:02 β€” πŸ‘ 68    πŸ” 11    πŸ’¬ 22    πŸ“Œ 19

I hope you have a nice night.
I hope you look at the stars with wonder.
I hope you're never lost in the catacombs without a lantern.
I hope you're always able to find room for one more book on your bookshelves.
I hope you feel at home in the forest, because you're always welcome there.

06.02.2026 03:01 β€” πŸ‘ 121    πŸ” 35    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 4

It's ok to not feel ok.
It's ok if your antlers haven't grown in yet.
It's ok if you can't shape-shift into a raven.
It's ok if you haven't haunted the night for a while.
I know you're doing your best, and that's all any of us can do right now.

06.03.2026 23:55 β€” πŸ‘ 188    πŸ” 68    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 5

What's your favorite kind of tree?

1. mossy creeper
2. colorful dreamer
3. old bastard
4. gnarled weirdo

06.03.2026 03:31 β€” πŸ‘ 55    πŸ” 10    πŸ’¬ 14    πŸ“Œ 8

Your daily fortune:
Folks who are truly rich do not hoard wealth, but the knowledge and experience that comes from reading books and eating burritos.

06.02.2026 17:01 β€” πŸ‘ 54    πŸ” 13    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 2

Don't fight the tides.
Become a wrathful sea witch and harness the immense power of the deep dark sea and the ancient weird creatures lurking within.

06.03.2026 20:35 β€” πŸ‘ 67    πŸ” 10    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 1

There is still beauty in the world if you know where to look.
The first flowers of the year peaking through the earth, or the deep red gleam in the eyes of Mothman as he surprises you in the alley behind the kebab shoppe.

09.02.2026 00:34 β€” πŸ‘ 73    πŸ” 12    πŸ’¬ 2    πŸ“Œ 1

Your daily affirmation:
Every day is a brand new day, and a new chance to start writing a strange manifesto about ghost cats.

06.03.2026 17:01 β€” πŸ‘ 49    πŸ” 7    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 2

What's your favorite kind of tree?

1. mossy creeper
2. colorful dreamer
3. old bastard
4. gnarled weirdo

06.03.2026 03:31 β€” πŸ‘ 55    πŸ” 10    πŸ’¬ 14    πŸ“Œ 8

Did you know?
- certain trees get important nutrients from human bones
- other trees collect souls and trap them in their ring labyrinths
- most trees agree that squirrels are jerks
- 3% of trees are named Dennis

05.03.2026 23:00 β€” πŸ‘ 123    πŸ” 28    πŸ’¬ 7    πŸ“Œ 1

There are many ways to show someone you care.
Be there for them.
Craft matching swords and imbue them with old magic.
Adventure through the wildlands together, searching for mossy forgotten tombs of the forest gods and the dark secrets hidden within.

04.02.2026 23:41 β€” πŸ‘ 86    πŸ” 31    πŸ’¬ 3    πŸ“Œ 1