Edmonds Scanner

Which animal ability would you like to have?

1. prehensile tail
2. winter hibernation
3. grasping tentacles
4. echolocation for burritos

a deer with antlers absolutely covered by ferns and looking fabulous

How do you like my new look? Be honest.

Good night, friends.
May the darkness wrap around you like a blanket, may the stars shine upon your path, and may the gothic mansion you flee to in a storm only be as haunted as you want it to be.

Someday, the old witch will return and lift the curse placed upon you.
Your human shell will crack open and a cloud of clattering ravens will emerge and disappear into the fog which covers the moors.

What forest spirit best matches your mood?

1. forlorn bog hag
2. doom moose
3. weird mossy stump
4. wandering darkness

Always keep a song in your heart and a dagger on your hip, is what my granny used to say.
No one ever messed with her at karaoke, believe me.

Life is about finding balance.
For every hour you spend chasing hikers from the forest with the dark grandeur of your shambling form, spend an equal amount of time using the dark grandeur of your shambling form to chase hikers from the forest.
It's that simple.

Your daily affirmation:
Color outside the lines. Dress like nobody's watching. There are no limits to your weirdness in this world.

Which animal ability would you like to have?

1. prehensile tail
2. winter hibernation
3. grasping tentacles
4. echolocation for burritos

I don't know about you, but I'd feel a lot better if we were allowed to disappear into a malevolent fog once in a while and become a dark creature of folklore and legend.

What's your vibe?

1. cyberpunk vampire
2. boozy bon-vivant
3. exhausted elder goth
4. Muppet on a budget

Your daily fortune:
Luck is equal parts preparation, hard work, cosmic weirdness, and dark fairy mischief.

Do something nice for yourself every day.
Enjoy a fancy coffee, take a little walk, or craft a den of twigs & wildflowers in the old forest, retreat inside, and sleep for 1,000 years in mossy peace.

We're all trying to get by, in our own way.
And if your way involves books, strong tea, and secret meetings with the old gods in the mossy end of the forest, so much the better.

Cassette tapes in a wooden frame

It's all about perspective

Your daily affirmation:
You are made of atoms.
Atoms are made by stars.
Stars are hot.
Therefore, you are hot.
Don't forget that.

A case of cassette tapes

It's meant to be displayed like this and is alphabetized correctly! 😆

Whatever we were able to tape from our friends. Probably a combo of 3 Feet High and DLS is Dead.

a collection of audio cassette tapes in a wooden holder.

You just need a different perspective. It was meant to hang on the wall like this.

a neon sign of a boombox is glowing in the dark . Alt: a neon sign of a boombox is glowing in the dark .

Probably on KCMU, which was our college station here in the PNW. It's now KEXP, and it's still amazing!

Which one would you pick Matt? I'm a fan and always appreciate your takes on the Sounders.

a bunch of audio cassettes in a wooden holder

It's meant to be hung portrait style. i just posted it landscape style so it was easier to read. It's alphabetized, I swear! 😂

Nah, I was buy Nirvana bootlegs on vinyl from sketchy record stores in the U-district. I didn't need their early stuff on cassette.

What's your vibe?

1. cyberpunk vampire
2. boozy bon-vivant
3. exhausted elder goth
4. Muppet on a budget

a very tall tower with a cloudy sky behind it Alt: a very tall tower, the Space Needle, with a cloudy sky behind it

Correct on the year, but wrong coast!

a collection of audio cassette tapes

What are you playing first on your boombox?