Mat Elfring

I hope you have a slideshow prepared.

I can't wait for the advancements in blood letting.

RFK Jr. is to medicine as I am to professional cricket.

I know cricket exists, but I have zero understanding of it.

However, the difference is that I don't lie about understanding it.

"Hey do you need us to spray for bugs?"
"No. I looked up your company. You have nothing but 1 star reviews."

Three months later:
"Hey do you need us to spray for bugs?"
"What did I tell you three months ago?"

Repeat... forever.

Update from Prestige Wrestling about the show:

And... it happened... I got sick of all the salespeople ringing my doorbell and I bought a no solicitors sign.

I am 43.

Oh my god I swear this will be the last one but HOLY SHIT I HAD AN IDEA.

WWE sucks but "Obsession" by Animotion is SUCH A GREAT SONG so I bestow it to #AEWDynamite now. #wrestlesky

It's very addicting to do these. I spent most of my morning before work, looking through my music collection to put behind this video. Damn you, AEW.

I'm not allowed on the plane. @kingserpentico.bsky.social told me I have to drive him in his personal station wagon.

Real excited in two months when Barron Trump debuts on Smackdown as "Sad Barron."

This is the best version I made this morning of the AEW Dynamite intro... with Curtis Mayfield.

I wish I had better video editing software to match the beats for this AEW intro video, mainly because I'm wearing my Amy Winehouse shirt today.

Lol. Thank you

My contribution.

5 new comics to read in August, including Adventure Time’s Bubbline in college 5 new comics to read in August, including Adventure Time’s Bubbline in college

5 COMIC BOOKS TO READ THIS MONTH from @avclub.com

Featuring ADVENTURE TIME: THE BUBBLINE COLLEGE SPECIAL #1 from @cashbrowns.bsky.social 💗

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Today is final order cutoff (FOC) day for my book Little Visitor & Other Abductions!

If you want to order it through your LCS or directly through Lunar you can use the code 0225ON571

@oni-press.bsky.social #horror #comics #ufo

Blocking me is completely acceptable if my views don't align with your own and what I say even remotely annoys you. Totally cool.

You don't have to yell at me. Just block me. It's cool.

Your main contact was Nate Dogg, and I am sad to say, he passed away in 2011.

I've put in a call for a 2PM session with your therapy dog.

A spokesperson for Janel Grant released a statement: “This attempt to sweep misconduct under the rug will backfire. We look forward to the full set of facts, including those about Mr. Lesnar, coming out in a court of law where they belong…”

Full statement below:

I updated this with links to the things I discussed regarding the Janel Grant case and Triple H on Fox News and his water spit at the White House.

Thank you for saying it's "very good stuff."

WWE And The Straw That Broke The Camel's Back | I'm Mat Elfring Get more from I'm Mat Elfring on Patreon

Here's a thing I recorded earlier this morning. I watch WWE because my son loves wrestling and WWE. However, after last night, I'm not letting him watch anymore.

I mean... that's why I was still watching. My son likes it. There's a lot of great performers, but putting a sex trafficker back in the spotlight is really fucked up.

sorry to all the excellent performers who have to work for a shitheel company like WWE

AEW Dynamite airs Wednesdays at 8 PM ET on TBS.

This company is morally bankrupt.
#SummerSlam

I have an idea for a mind-blowing finish to a wrestling match. Someone wins after giving their opponent a totally normal vertical suplex.

If this street fight actually breaks out into the streets, I'll lose it

Wrestling street fights should start exactly like real street fights start: two drunk guys with their arms stretched out and chests puffed out saying, "what you gonna do about it bro? Come at me" for 10 minutes, which quickly turns into 2 minutes of laughable punches until someone slips on some beer