Parody Nigel Farage

Meanwhile, our decision to put a 19 year old in charge of a council is working out very well.
www.bbc.co.uk/news/article...

As a man of the people, I naturally used a private jet provided by a crypto billionaire based in Thailand for my latest publicity stunt.

Graham Eardley, the Reform councillor suspended for behaving aggressively towards a female volunteer, has defected to Restore Britain, no doubt attracted by Rupert Lowe having been accused of bullying two female members of staff.

As bombs rain down death and destruction, the good news is that Donald Trump still has plenty of time to play golf with his rich mates at Mar-a-Lago.

As a man of the people, I naturally used a private jet provided by a crypto billionaire based in Thailand for my latest publicity stunt.

A Reform government will display Union flags on everything, right up until we replace them when we become the 51st state of America.

I couldn't appear on the Laura Kuenssberg show as I'm in the US doing important work for my Clacton constituents, who want me to undermine the UK by sucking up to an unhinged authoritarian pedo.

The search for me in Clacton enters its 87th week.

A Reform government will display Union flags on everything, right up until we replace them when we become the 51st state of America.

I couldn't appear on the Laura Kuenssberg show as I'm in the US doing important work for my Clacton constituents, who want me to undermine the UK by sucking up to an unhinged authoritarian pedo.

The search for me in Clacton enters its 87th week.

I thought the best person to talk to Laura Kuenssberg about the important moral and ethical issues of the day would be Robert Jenrick, the man who overruled a planning decision to save a billionaire pornographer £45m in exchange for a £12,000 donation.

"I said it's quite bold of Nigel Farage to go to the US to side with Donald Trump against his own country. What did I say Roy?"
"You said he's a treacherous self-serving sack of shit"

Boris Johnson says Keir Starmer has made us an irrelevance on the world stage...

My meeting with Donald Trump went very much as expected.

Why would the people of Durham not vote Reform - what's not to like about increasing council tax, cutting £12.9m from services, having a Deputy Leader who posts AI lies or a Leader who ran two companies that went bust owing more than £500k in tax?

Who better to accuse others of being a laughing stock than the sexually incontinent compulsive liar who can't dress himself and combs his hair with a balloon?

“Dear Diary,
Super excited to say that I’ll be serving my Clacton constituents today by flying to Mar-a-Lago to meet Donald Trump and to undermine the UK government. God I love being a patriot!”

Reform's Treasurer and star of the Epstein files, Nick Candy, says he feels safer in Dubai than in London.
If I know Nick, he'd rather get bombed than pay any tax. What a patriot!

Reform councillor Graham Eardley has been suspended for behaving so aggressively towards a female volunteer that security had to escort him out. That’s at least 63 Reform councillors gone in ten months – nearly one in ten!

We had a fantastic launch for our Senedd election manifesto in Wales. Just a shame my good friend, senior colleague, former Leader of Reform in Wales and convicted traitor, Nathan Gill, couldn’t be with us to enjoy it.

Won’t someone think of the smug, wealthy tax-dodgers?

Today we launch our plan for Wales, putting behind us the dark days when Nathan Gill, the Leader of Reform in Wales, took bribes to do the bidding of foreigners.
In other news, we have just had another £3million donation from a crypto investor who lives in Thailand...

Today the world’s media turned away from the war in Iran to focus on the Reform UK Press Conference to hear me announce… the defection of a couple of councillors that nobody’s ever heard of or gives a shit about.

WANTED: Morons, racists, fuckwits, criminals, bigots and numbskulls to stand as Reform UK candidates. Total ignorance of local authorities preferred and we promise not to check your social media history!

If these people are found to be working for a foreign power, Keir Starmer will be personally responsible. Whereas when a senior Reform colleague is jailed for ten years for taking bribes from Russia, that is nothing to do with me.

GB News loses £22m, taking their total losses to over £130m. Except it's not a 'loss', it's an investment by Paul Marshall in providing a propaganda service to platform right wing grifters, gobshites, conspiracy nutters and contrarian fuckwits.

I must apologise for Richard Stupid Tice not understanding that no gas or oil is ‘our own’ because Maggie Thatcher sold it off, so it is all sold by private companies on the global market. Norway did not sell theirs off and now have a sovereign wealth fund of £1.6trillion.

"We called London a war zone and moved to Dubai by mistake"

It's almost as though things you say on social media can have real world consequences after all.