flynn ꒰ she/they ꒱

having chronic depression is hard ;w; like I just wanna be happy and enjoy things but instead I feel deflated, exhausted + always low

it's hard feeling like I'm a loser compared to everyone else 😞

I feel like I'm shit at everything & I am lol

feeling completely dead inside ;w;

no energy, no interest in things, crying all the time, wanting to quit everything i'm doing atm

just a big ball of sadness and i don't know how to get out of it

rejection sensitivity sucks SO MUCH it convinces me daily that all my friends hate me & don't want me around 🙃

so then in turn I decide to isolate myself bc my brain tells me I ruin the vibes so I should just stay away and keep myself to myself

big sigh

feeling incredibly despondent + burnt out ;w;

nothing feels very meaningful in my life and honestly I've run out of ideas of what to do now.

my small business is failing, im socially isolated, im depressed and i struggle with functioning at all.

u g h all i want is to be happy

having a wake up time enforced as a 27 y/o living at home w/ my parents makes me feel super upset + is making my physical issues so so much worse ;w;

im exhausted all the time + struggle so much w/ insomnia etc.

knowing I matter to less and less people is slowly breaking my heart ;w;

everything in my life is going badly - my streaming, my small business, my health

i am barely hanging on

the feeling of letting people down is not nice ;w;

brain dump !

😨 v anxious about my trip to the Netherlands w/ my dissociation
💔 parents accept my adhd but aren't really understanding
👁️ my derealisation is ass rn
👹 luteal phase this cycle is a wild ride
😓 anxiety spicy

when you're hurting badly and you feel so alone with it

im spiralling terribly - am I ever going to feel happy or be able to understand who I am now?

if my adhd assessor tells me it's "just anxiety" im gonna spiral into a deep hole & never come out i fear 🕳️

parents are supportive until they get annoyed at you for missing something when you're crying your eyes out for hours after a terrible experience

believe it or not I didn't miss something to be mean

makes me feel worthless

thank you for your kind words. I'm honestly so confused how I fit so much of the criteria but they didn't diagnose or at least not diagnose but tell me explicitly! now I've been left hanging for who knows how long for their official outcome

didn't think more things could be horrible in my life but just had a terrible adhd assessment and they couldn't even give me an indication of whether or not I had adhd

have spent the last 2 hours crying my eyes out

not a single thing in my life is going well

feeling like a failure atm in everything I do and it's such a heavy feeling that I'm struggling to get away from because I'm realising there is nothing I'm actually good at

putting so much work in and seeing nothing from it sucks so bad & is so hard for me to cope with ngl

gah being neurodivergent + going through severe pms is so hard !! do be crashing out so much atm 🙃

legit just had a cry because I don't want to walk to the opticians because there's too many people and I just cannot cope with that right now

today has been horrendous 😞

feeling so low + anxious and feels like my life is crumbling apart

no longer growing as a streamer, my small biz isnt receiving any orders + in a poor financial situ living at home

things keep getting worse & I don't know what to do

I see others progressing in life - moving out, being in a relationship, having a job & I want that so much for myself.

I haven't had a job since 2016 and w/ no experience I'd be unlikely to secure one even if I could work. And therefore I'm not able to be financially stable & it's so hard 🥹

feeling very overwhelmed atm ~ in an anxiety flare-up, physically feeling like poop w/ fatigue + terrible headaches that won't shift, sore throat + coming up to that time of the month 😭

this is simply too many things at once for my brain to handle

it's been hitting me a lot lately that I have a bsc + msc but I haven't been able to use them to pursue marine science due to the pandemic starting, my own health + what seems to be a classist system existing in science 👀

I mourn the person I wanted to be but know I'm valid as I am now ❤️‍🩹

let's do a lil small business/artist #promosky ~!

let's become mutuals! 👇🏻

⭐ arts + crafts
⭐ lgbtqia+ business
⭐ chronically ill
⭐ disabled
⭐ handmade
⭐ video games
⭐ pop culture
⭐ free palestine
⭐ mental health advocacy
⭐ polymer clay
⭐ painting

♡+⟳ appreciated

🏷️ #smallbusiness #smallbiz

being chronically ill + disabled is becoming increasingly hard for me I'm ngl

I haven't made any profit this year at all from my small business + my streaming has been less of an income since the sub prices have increased

can't work a trad 9-5 so I'm left without many options & I'm scared 💔

it's taking a lot of time + patience to start to understand myself more & how to navigate this neurotypical world

but we're getting there - one step at a time!

being able to yap freely here is helping 🫶🏻

feeling sad cos I always get passed up for opportunities & I really feel like I do have something to offer the world

just want to be good at one thing. at least something else pls world?

im terrible at everything lol

I feel on the edge of every single group I'm apart of 🥲

so today I actually felt really good 🥹🥹🥹

I love when your nhs therapy service doesn't communicate with you at all so you have no idea if today is your last session because they ignore all your emails 🥲

+ have to beg them for a video therapy link??

+ they promised me in-person therapy??

asdfghjkl

my favourite life hack w/ severe anxiety is just stay in bed ✌🏻

anyone else either always anxious or always depressed??

feel like I never have just neutral moods !

ya ever just realise that those dreams you had are never coming true?

yea me too