potion of

girlfriend gf she is a your romantic and/or sexual interest you love her you like spending time with her she likes spending time with you she loves you

Got a job in the prophecy fulfillment agency shits easy as hell these prophecies fulfill themselves

Mr Bean Does Dallas

working at westhill marks and spencers

what are some good groceries to buy as a beginner

now you see me again

you been blowing up for awhile now

disassociating at the bluetooth convention

my merry-go-round is a machine that turns

robot brain

🌬🙂💨

waiter there's a fly in my frog

i forgot how 😔

that's where we beat crab man with hammers for ratting us out to internal affairs

let's do good cop crab cop

not much honestly

would a dog wear a hairnet like this or like this: IMG_4346.jpeg

no demand

my lawyer dog is telling me this is incorrect

there's nothing in the food safety code that says a dog can't make ramen

you shouldn’t rake the leaves in your yard. the leaves act as habitats for beneficial insects and break down into nutrients that strengthen the soil

that’s absolutely right Alex 🗣️🗣️🗣️

typing my whole resume into the WebMD searchbar

1000 years good luck

for that you'll have to ask your doctor

throw the jar of tongue depressors in his face

turn the other cheek to the side and cough

i find myself getting lost in your eyes. there are no exits. not sure how i got here in the first place. it’s been weeks. no food or water, but i can hear the minotaur

ask your doctor what the fuck is his problem

if your onion were truly humble it would turn the other cheek