ash

Cancel culture, but for that post you can't get to make sense.

if you don’t love me at my hooba you don’t deserve me at my stank

😆

😘

them: if you keep eating dumplings like that you're going to turn into one
me: maybe that's my goal Keith!

Training to comfortably order a McRib globally.

Your car horn is not a toy, you fucking toddlers.

Depends where it is. 😆

Ive done that and the guilt afterwards. 😔 lol

a young girl in a black tank top and brown shorts is standing in a field Alt: a young girl in a black tank top and brown shorts is standing in a field

😄

Where’d You Put the Body, Charlie Brown

have you tried jumping in a big pile of leaves about it?

Whew. So I'm not alone. 😆

I admit I had to think about it. 😆

Any other exhibitionists ever have that nightmare where you’re fully clothed in public?

😆

When large accounts repost me, I walk funny the next day

Might just start replying to my own posts you're lame.

preparing for the apocalypse by becoming fluent in zombie

I'm just glad no one can read mine. Its noisy in there. 🫶

I don't mind my inner voice. I just wish it wasn't so negative all the fucking time

Nice! Im about to go workout right after lunch. 😃

Little Red Corvette is my favorite song about Hot Wheels

Imagine how much we’re not seeing

every day’s a new jumpscare

You say menacing aura like it's a bad thing

Might as well admit it, I chuckle every time I hear the word “bowels”

British people be like “I bot yew a fokin vape innit”

The baby took my phone away yesterday but the baby is letting me post today