Theciscokidder

😆

That was a lot of work

😂

I shaved your balls for this?

If she enjoys sports and documentaries about serial killers, she’s a keeper

The I'ds of March

I'd better set the alarm clock earlier.
I'd better go to the gym more.
I'd better get taxes done.
I'd like some pizza.

to whomever is saving all of my posts: i hope you print them out and cover your walls with them zodiac killer style

Got high and spent the last hour deciding between ice cream and cheese for dinner. Still thinking about it

Me, every time I see her naked.

Screw bananas. One second they’re like, “Don’t worry bro you got days to eat us,” and then you turn around and they’re like, *cough* “We’re dying bro. You should’ve eaten us days ago bro.” *cough*

a restaurant that serves chili from a soda dispenser

my ventriloquism act is finally ready for the radio

"You've unsubscribed! Was this a mistake?"
no, you stupid fuck, it took me seven clicks to get here

Quick! What kinda scientist would you want to be?

One step ahead of you brother!

OnlyFans, but it's just me rubbing different meats.

We had a Stradivarius violin from the 1700s come into our store and I don’t know if y’all understand how big a deal that is but it’s major. Violins from that time period from the actual maker of Stradivari are worth untold amounts of money. Amazing to be close to that history for a moment

I officially went under contract on the house I’m getting today.

On Friday the 13th *cue nervous laughter*

Nobody names their Tybalts "Mercutio" anymore and other format lectures that didn't get any likes this semester

I posted a dune.

~Dyslexic me

Grew up with 4 male siblings but not one funk soul brother.

I’m fluent in saying “ohhhhh” when I still don’t understand.

Sorry I didn't respond like a human. I've been dissociated for the last ten years. Blob brain.

Glad to provide!

🙂

😆

#Scape #ForestFriday #photography

A whimsical autumn escape into the woods…flaming deciduous trees welcome visitors.

i like to post nonsensical bs for all
if you don't like it
you'll probably not like my butthole skeets

jus sayin

😂