panken

my one problem is i already have a little ikea cat plushie i sleep with so what if it gets jealous. i could try holding both in my arms but then it's a crowd

what if i got a bigass stuffed animal to hug in bed 💭

i hope all the aroaces are having a nice valentines day... i'm not religious but i still love a good christmas

i remember being a little kid and feeling compelled to jump on every piece of urban furniture when i was outside. barriers half-walls concrete benches just an irrepressible compulsion to hop from thing to thing. spiritually a billy goat

no yeah i end up alternating between a billion things trying to shake my head loose so i can get back to work 😔 games wikipedia comics etc etc... talking to/hanging out with friends feels like the healthiest of the ways i've been spending my time but it's also not getting me closer to productivity

whatever bullshit is wrong with me is self-sustaining too because it took me years to gather the mental wherewithal to get help and it's been even longer for me to ~consider~ starting the process to find another psychologist to get a second opinion re: adhd diagnosis. i feel barely human

i've noticed i've started just trying to rationalize my inactivity like "i shouldn't let capitalism convince me i have to produce things" "i've already made enough stuff in the past it's okay to rest now" "it wouldn't've come out good anyway" fuck you? i want to do things? i want to live my life?

maybe i have to accept i'm just not gonna get anything done for the time being. i have been begging my brain to let me work but i just. fall asleep as soon as i sit down to do things. i can scroll through bullshit online for hours but anything productive is just too much to handle apparently

panken has dated 4 people in his long and storied life

i hope to one day be a geek in love again!...

there was barely a meme culture to speak of so people online were just going around quoting star wars and monty python. maybe pokemon and that teen wizard motherfucker. the counterculture was billion dollar franchises there's a bleakness to it in hindsight but it was so blissful in the moment

YouTube video by AlbinoBlackSheep Geeks in Love ♫

oh my god this song is 21 years old and i haven't heard it in at least 15. we've gone through so many discourse cycles since then that what it conveys is almost alien now. post-cringe era unearthing a pre-cringe artifact. i used to send this to my e-gf lmao

www.youtube.com/watch?v=KbDV...

owls are unconcerned by such trivialities

hey no

bigass owl by my house swooped down and landed on a tree i can see it staring back at me i don't know what it wants does it want me. am i giving off rodent. is there a rodentness to me i'm not aware of

hard to buy anything shelf-stable when you live somewhere prone to earthquakes

going door to door in my cupid costume spreading scary love

these are so potent

HEY happy birthday viccy :] !!!

where i'm from they don't really do those little heart-shaped candies with the words on them. what are those like. always figured they'd taste like straight chalk

right nobody's asked me out for valentine's day yet

growing up on 2000s internet with a silent yet burning rage against emoticons then later starting to use ":)" or ":D" in a sarcastic shit-eating grin way and gradually using it more and more earnestly because you haven't yet realized you've been in your 30s for a while now

i think i have about 1 more migration in me before i just call it quits with the internet

sudden recollection of that spicy ginger cordial i bought once. my god why haven't i been buying it more. i should've been drinking that this whole time

sooo so cute!!

that's like people who describe themselves as "aspiring artist" if you draw at all you're an artist. if you wish you had a tail and/or paws you're a furry. simple!!!!!!!

i am young. i am very young. i know what sigma rizz means. i am shockingly young

it's fine i survived aim i survived icq i survived yahoo messenger i survived msn i survived skype i WILL fucking survive discord i GUESS

fucking cool having to be a permanent online diaspora never able to settle down on a messaging app or social network because they keep killing themselves in the name of profit or fascism

craving community with other artists a little but it's so cozy in my own discord server (that i no longer spread around because i worry an influx of new people would upset the delicate social ecosystem within) god if it dies because of discord co's shitass business decisions i will be miffed