Uncle Mort

'Cause for Celebration', the first episode of I Didn't Know You Cared, was broadcast on this day in 1975. Written by Peter Tinniswood, it starred Robin Bailey, John Comer, Bert Palmer, Liz Smith, Stephen Rea and Anita Carey.

This is just the place where you wouldn't mind being knocked down by a runaway harmonium.

I'll never forget weather the day I met mother-in-law for first time.

Gale force winds and sleet from the north east. Sank a dredger in Liverpool Bay.

All hands lost.

I wish I'd been on it.

I'll never forget weather the day I met mother-in-law for first time.

Gale force winds and sleet from the north east. Sank a dredger in Liverpool Bay.

All hands lost.

I wish I'd been on it.

Breathe deeply. The smells of a perfect summers day.

Stale socks, damp cricket pads, and the slow heady scent of a leaking gasworks.

My Fantastic Four

Right, you lot. Bugger off. I'm going to get some shut-eye.

I Didn't Know You Cared (18th May 1976). Pat's mother, Mrs Partington (Vanda Godsell), pays a visit.

Last time Edna redecorated lavatory she forgot to screw seat back on toilet.

First time I used it I bent forward to kick cat and whoosh! I was through door, I were downstairs like a tobogganist on Cresta Run.

I would still have been going yet only my braces got tangled in bannisters.

My first kiss were Blackpool Bank Holiday Monday, 1922.

When my late wife fell head first into the jellyfish infested briny.

I kissed the donkey what tripped her.

Spring. Season of romance and Airtex underpants.

I like enjoyment providing it doesn't interfere with being miserable.

You can't call this the land of the living. I've seen more animation in the inside of a Hoover bag.

Possibly the greatest sitcom ever made, proud to own all four series. Over time I have turned into Uncle Mort.
Can't recommend the books enough too, darker than the TV adaptation.

As there is such a dearth of comedy on tv for aspiring writers to watch I’m going to recommend a classic sitcom every day for you to find. I’ll start with I Didn’t Know You Cared (1975-9) by the brilliant Peter Tinniswood, a dry, mordant, weird show starring Liz Smith & Stephen Rea, amongst many.

Conjugal bliss has a lot to answer for in history of world's misery.

Isn't it funny how a little thing like a cream cracker can put the idea of death right out of your mind?

Right, you lot. Bugger off. I'm going to get some shut-eye.

Well, you raise white flag, you stagger into scullery screaming,

"No, no, I can't take no more!"

Then what do they do?

Give you presents you don't want and stare at you till you smile.

Mince pies.

Almond pastry.

Chocolate log.

Salvo after salvo of sour tangerines!

I served all through First World War. I never saw nowt so ghastly.

The menfolk cowering in trenches.

Silence, then without warning, the women open up with this terrifying, ceaseless bombardment.

Nowts worse than Christmas. It's the one time of year when women show theirselves in their true colours.

Culinary tyrants.

Warlords of kitchen range!

Christmas. You're trapped in house for three days solid. All you get is heartburn and a surfeit of second cousins.

Deprivation? You don't know meaning of the word. You wait until you've been standing half an hour in a bus shelter in centre of Doncaster.

Tomorrow morning I need to take my hanky to the vets to get it painlessly destroyed.

Marriage and Rugby League. There's nowt to choose between the two institutions.

Right, you lot. Bugger off. I'm going to get some shut-eye.

A man could die happy having lived in Splott.

There's a lot to be said for death. I bet it's not half as boring as life.

I once saw Nat Lofthouse, the Lion of Vienna. It was in the Co-op pharmacy at Haslingden. He was buying a packet of corn plasters.