MennoSimmons

Why don’t I have a badass nickname like ‘Typhoid Mary’

Look at the eyes. Dead inside. No soul

Being a grownup is a total ripoff

Getting ready for the revolution #nokings #nokingsinameeica #hippieshit #coexist

Don’t know why but I seriously respect this dude

Gulf of Tylenol

@abbyhiggs.bsky.social messaging you from heaven. Where u at

That’s because they can’t go to the doctor! They don’t get diagnosed! God doesn’t allow it and the ‘English’ are heathens. Women commonly die in childbirth because they are not allowed to go to prenatal care or the hospital. There’s a reason my name is MennoSimons

That’s because they can’t go to the doctor! They don’t get diagnosed! God doesn’t allow it and the ‘English’ are heathens. Women commonly die in childbirth because they are not allowed to go to prenatal care or the hospital, unless their husband approves but then they both get in trouble.

My MIL’s marriage cert was rejected because it’s from Iran. She can’t get her Florida license 🙄

Wait so they’re just saying everything they’ve been caught doing wrong is ‘fake’?

Morning meditation:

Breathe in .. breathe out…
I’m not gon scream and shout
I said breathe in .. breathe out..
Don’t knock they ass out
I said breathe in.. breathe out..
I’m not gon scream and shout
I said breathe in.. breathe out..
Don’t knock they ass out

At what age do you learn to keep lightbulbs in the cabinet

Did we do that for the MN Democratic senator, her husband and their family DOG ffs

No but there was another school shooting today worth mentioning. Colorado this week

Me? That was in Delaware at the beach, 1990’s 😮‍💨

Exactly what I’m saying

Oh shit did the civil war start already?

If there is a club for people who can’t find their way out of parking lots, I’ll go ahead and sign up.
Sarasota chapter, please

Even more interesting- what is the LEADING cause of death in children in America right now? Gunfire

I love these things. They are so cute, funny, curious and they love music. I like to talk to them like we’ve always been best friends

Florida lawn care in action

Just found out Truth Social is in the same office building as my new job🤢
Need a good deal on FART SPRAY

You think he has the Epstein files?

And I don’t want ANY of my taxes going to these new oppressive horseshit laws coming out

There’s some asshole with a jeep in the work parking lot with all this crap plastered on it. It takes everything in me not to dump my shitcan of dog crap in the driver seat. I settle for staring and cursing it as hard as I can

Just finished Come Hell & High Water and it makes me want to cry. Wtf America. I want to help but I think the most I can do is be a decent human, help people, and not be a racist POS.

And U.S. Army General Russel Honore is a badass.

A Hispanic family came yesterday to buy a pressure washer, I had the distinct feeling after they left that could be their last hundred bucks and am really considering reaching back out to refund their money or offer some help if somewhere down the line they need a friend

That was one of my first best concerts!

I tried responding to the email announcement ‘everybody hates them anyway’ but it came back undelivered 😏