👨🏼‍🦰

being sick when the sun is out is a cruel form of torture

Market Days will be a success if i hear this song on a dance floor at some point

my style: 4-yr-old with a credit card

my cat announces himself as he saunters down the hallway at me. just screaming to let me know he’s coming. thanks for the heads up, lil guy!

i’m calling an uber

this is not my streaky mirror but i am not mad about this lighting

🎶 i don’t really wanna do the work today 🎶

sometimes a guy is just too handsome, y’know. suspicious

this is what is so devastating: i reapply sunscreen 🎶constantly🎶

i came here to say i looked tan but upon further reflection, this may just be a sunburn. devastating

i’m not tired, you’re tired

the apple weather app sucks, right?

friend that will give you uppies >>>

it would take the same amount of time for you to search your inbox as it does for you to email me asking me to resend you the email i sent yesterday. hope this helps!

this sentence gives me a stomachache

you mean the lyrics aren’t “big heart, big fedora”?!

like the opposite of Get Ready With Me content

the One True Mirror appears

a man appears

so much to stare at

truly! i didn’t ask for all this and now i have to maintain it?!

a woman with curly hair is wearing a red tank top and gloves . ALT: a woman with curly hair is wearing a red tank top and gloves .

so you think i’m skinny

whyyyyyyy does going to the gym actually improve my mood? ugh now i have to go back tomorrow

will this gym session help me get out of this funk? 🤞🏻🤞🏻🤞🏻

as someone who loves little treats: i feel your pain
as someone who also loves sour patch kids: how dare you

reframing this mandatory staff outing as an afternoon off of work

mondays are the worst

i have become a couch

“look this sticker says my name!

…

wait a minute”