(っ◔◡◔)っ ♥ riley taylor ♥

if i ever become famous i want brooks moore (the narrator for how it’s made) to narrate my life story

there’s a weird influencer/kid youtuber cadence that irks me to the bone

these can’t be real people… yet they are

my wife calling me a sick individual for desiring the chalky varieties of candy

GOD FORBID A GIRL EATS SOMD CHALK

pikachu big naturals is the next evolutionary step from Gandalf big naturals the world is just not ready for it

seeing my wife pickup her boytoy like he’s a stuffy is so fucking adorable 😭

Smokey is the only government figure my kids are allowed to look up to

7 years ago I also hurt myself enough I had to go home what the fuck are the odds

🫂

totally didn’t crush my big toe and give myself a nauseating panic attack no ma’am didn’t happen

in other news does anyone know how long a crushed toe will hurt? Asking for a friend

Tweaking yellow guy with hands out

GIMME GIMME GIMME

Wearing my glasses for the first time in months bc they’re semi broken and I don’t have eye strain trying to focus on my phone like a boomer

thank you so much @softsoftserve.fun for fixing them 🥺

no that’s you 🥺

iPhone weather humidity projection for the morning of August 3rd 2025 reading 96 percent

MAN FUCK the south you can drink this fucking air

thinking about this time where my friend had just like 7 wild rabbits passing through his front yard and I tried so hard to befriend them

that was 8 years ago already damn

Rachel Summers smiling in a volcano next to the Onion article “Mom and Dad, I’m gay and also stronger than both of you so don’t try any shit.”

angery Apollo the cat

Apollo will do it and howl until he’s in front of the bowl that he just came from eating from

photo of a warehouse from the top down perspective from an e picker device

tall girl gets very high

my new job is in an order fulfillment warehouse for a major western ware company and little do the country dudes who buy pants know they have now have a 10% chance for t girl sweat on their fancy pants before they even get to touch them

when I was a Dell tech I drove almost 2 hours to a call just for them to tell me they shipped it to Dell the day prior… so at least someone’s relying on you 😂😭

slurpee machine with one crashed screen

I'm drinking the Bios Crash slurpee I hope it crashes my bios I hope I blue screen

unregulated anxiety going brrrr about the new job tomorrow

at least i can flex on them with a slammed ass car

ngl I miss subohm vaping like 2016 era dangerous ass unregulated box mods that caught fire in our hands type shit no more of this disposable shit

me like breaking the law car go RAHHH brrr bang bang pew pew

it pays shit but atp it’s something and I don’t have to be in til 10am so that’s nice

Blue grinch with text that reads THAT FEELING WHEN A NEW JOB IS TOMORROW

start my new job tomorrow 😬

a baby standing and attempting to pull the cord out of a baby monitor device

daughter actively trying to disable her monitor #futurehacker

I want Microsoft edge to NEVER bother me again

if it’s micro soft and I want to be edged I’ll ASK MY WIFE

auto parts store tina can I have a personal serenade

my wife being bit by the bug of “I want this car but it needs this one to go with” that I’ve had for decades is beautiful and also a curse

it’s why at the beginning of this year we had 7 cars AND I WANTED MORE

we’re doing better and only have 5 now