@unhingedbfcomments.bsky.social
Dedicated to my boyfriend’s unhinged comments || His idea || He doesn’t remember half of what he’s said
“I’m drunk and watching shows from 1997 ho”
20.02.2026 00:21 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“I feel like… 🎶 ass 🎶”
24.06.2025 22:09 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“It’s not very Disney to use the historical version of bitches and tricks”
24.06.2025 22:08 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“He can’t hear your pithy remark”
21.06.2025 23:40 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“That would not be quality”
20.06.2025 17:35 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“The visceral feverish need for an 18 piece spicy tuna roll.”
20.06.2025 17:33 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“Think of the lives of all those yeasts… that went into culture of this drink… that now I now drink..”
24.05.2025 00:02 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“I’m not going to piss myself. I’m going to commit an act of violence.”
03.05.2025 11:47 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“I’m sorry babe you just got nutted in and probably don’t want to hear self defense talk”
09.04.2025 18:36 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“If you’re not lamenting like Achilles, do you even care?”
Edited by request
“I have a similar thought with oranges… in a sock.”
15.03.2025 20:26 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“Waking yourself up with electronics not very ancient human pilled, not very ice age core.”
13.03.2025 13:29 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“I need a spray bottle for people because what the fuck possessed you to say that?”
12.03.2025 12:07 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“This year we are allowing ourselves to yell and scream at people.We are holding space for me tearing your head off verbally.”
06.03.2025 20:22 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Him: “They’re gay. They can’t drive.”
Followed by
Also him: “You are a tried and true homosexual. You can’t even take a left turn.”
Him: “You look like a gnome with your red hood.”
Me: *does the neurodivergent stance or whatever it’s called*
Him:“You’re not beating the gnome allegations. Go look in the mirror”
😐
Shit people who do shit things that make shitty things even shittier in ways that I can never understand because I don’t have shit for brains.
12.02.2025 22:07 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Him: “Look at that dirt mound. I wanna climb that shit. If it’s still there the next full moon I’m doing it.”
Me: *laughs*
Him: “What you can’t tell me that shit isn’t imposing”
“I’m going to really abuse you now.”
*proceeds to kiss my belly so I get tickled by mustache hairs*
“Look at this stupid bitch. Texting and eating an apple while driving. Are you a sunny in Philadelphia bit?”
10.02.2025 18:42 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“Are you dating a dwarf or something? Or a dragon who wants a hoard of gold and swords?”
08.02.2025 23:52 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“I’m better than most boyfriends but the bar is in hell”
08.02.2025 13:06 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Me-“I got a lot on my mind”
Him-“You know what you can do to change that?”
Me-”What?”
Him-“Think about historical pottery”
😐
“There are a bunch of men playing chivalry right now, wishing they could lay down next to a woman.”
07.02.2025 21:36 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Felt muppets
06.02.2025 13:49 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Me: I don’t know how to spell
Him: You are not doing right by women😐
“So pitch movie to Adam Sandler…felt puppet characters story of Moses but all of them are new Englander Jews but Moses specifically from Maine.”
21.12.2024 16:00 — 👍 0 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0Pee being from blood is going to haunt my brain all day
29.12.2024 14:55 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“A handjob from a woman who milks goats”
27.12.2024 13:06 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0“So pitch movie to Adam Sandler…felt puppet characters story of Moses but all of them are new Englander Jews but Moses specifically from Maine.”
21.12.2024 16:00 — 👍 0 🔁 1 💬 0 📌 0
