Jon Bois

@jonbois.bsky.social watching football

this is actually the first balk to ever happen in any sport

even if film and tv were treated as entirely separate categories here i might answer steve buscemi for both

my favorite pastime in that stage was concocting elaborate explanations like "he's mad because he prefers the temperature to be 71 degrees instead of 70" instead of the obviously correct "he's mad because he's a baby"

that arms-out swaddle was a lifesaver for us, in large part because i never 100% mastered swaddling with a regular blanket

MIKE SWEENEY VS. JEFF WEAVER: THE HISTORY OF CHARGING THE MOUND, EPISODE 2. | Secret Base Get more from Secret Base on Patreon

here is THE HISTORY OF CHARGING THE MOUND, episode 2:
mike sweeney vs. jeff weaver. this story involves jim caviezel, steve wilkos, extreme passive-aggressiveness, some solid ground-and-pound, a cheap shot, and eventual crying www.patreon.com/posts/mike-s...

NFL’s New Overtime Rules - First possession per team - Which comes first: score or possession - If coin flip is heads, elect to kick or receive. Same if tails, once possessions - If a field goal is kicked on first possession, team on field must acquiesce Designed by Jon. Share with your friends if you found this helpful!

@jonbois.bsky.social watching football

tonight was the night the legend of arch manning began. this was his moment. sorry, i don't really watch college football that much, i didn't watch this game, and i don't even know if he's good or not. i just felt like saying some stuff

A eulogy for RadioShack, the panicked and half-dead retail empire This may very well be RadioShack’s final holiday season. Jon, a former employee, looks back on a strange, craven, five thousand-fingered strip-mall monster from a forgotten age.

Every Black Friday I take the time to read what is perhaps my favorite piece in the history of online media— @jonbois.bsky.social on RadioShack’s slow, painful death.

www.sbnation.com/2014/11/26/7...

College Football Time Remaining57m College football teams from around the country will intensely compete against one another, as expert analysts give play-by-play commentary.

Very good guide description written by @jonbois.bsky.social

the license plate on my $1000 sports car says “MR THANKSGIVING” because i celebrate thanksgiving each and every year

i'm way better than all of the dogs in the dog show. i can ride a bike, i can cook meals, and i'm very familiar with computers. i can do all kinds of things that they will never be able to do

me: “today i will be helping to cook thanksgiving dinner and spending time with my friends and family.” 🍽️

also me: “hopefully i will have the chance to watch some football as well.” 🏈

thanksgiving is a vibe!

thanksgiving is tomorrow. you could serve it for thanksgiving dessert if you want

thanksgiving

every thanksgiving, me and my family eat thanksgiving dinner

😯😯

there’s lots of good food

Cannot believe this soccer game announcer who talks like a @jonbois.bsky.social post

it’s impossible to make your own pasta from scratch at home. no one has ever done it

thumbnail for Episode 2 of The History of Charging the Mound, about the fight between Mike Sweeney and Jeff Weaver on 8/10/2001

dropping next monday on the patreon (28 minutes)

reminds me of when the new yorker wrote up a thing about 17776 and tweeted it out like "in the future, the year is 17776" and legions of their followers were like "erm, copy editor much"

funniest comedy movies of all time:

10. simpsons movie
9. simpsons tv show
8. randy's candies (1988)
7. randy's candies (2007)
6. randy's candies (1902)
5. chiefs vs. browns (2002)
4. randy's candies (2029)
3. a TRULY funny film that ya GOTTA see to believe!!
3. simpsons
2. comedies
1. GREAT movies

if a book counts as merch, then definitely

NFL’s New Overtime Rules - First possession per team - Which comes first: score or possession - If coin flip is heads, elect to kick or receive. Same if tails, once possessions - If a field goal is kicked on first possession, team on field must acquiesce Designed by Jon. Share with your friends if you found this helpful!

badly losing every single one of the 17 quote-post arguments i’m simultaneously having after insisting that the chiefs are socialist now because one of their coaches disagreed with donald trump’s comments about kickoff formations

tweets from like 2013 where a k-state fan calls me a “bumpkin fuck” for living in “louisville, kentucut”