Mercury Retrobabe

I’m so ready to leave, I hate being the only closer with the anxious hypercritical front desk people. You guys can’t even write names in order

a woman with blonde hair is making a funny face while sitting next to another woman . ALT: a woman with blonde hair is making a funny face while sitting next to another woman .

I’m gonna unleash my fucking fury on them in my own yard. You think I’m afraid to be the crazy girl screaming in the trailer park- bitch fuck a scene youre getting wwf level fuckery out of me

I’m about to be the biggest cunt to AAA, they out source their towing and battery services. I had my battery replaced in June, it died Saturday- I am getting ripped off and I’m pissed because the tech covered his own ass using an out of network battery. If they ask “did you keep the receipt?”-

Number two I don’t care how busy we are. I’m taking a lunch if I work a full day I get a break- boomers need to understand that you don’t get extra special points for not Taking a lunch

Things I am no longer dealing with or putting energy towards number one babysitting adults who refuse to take anxiety medication when they clearly need it.

Maybe I’m a pessimist but couples who have their profiles combined into one are weird

mr potato head says look i 'm picasso ALT: mr potato head says look i 'm picasso

The worst part of having crappy eyes is waiting extra long for your glasses to be made and delivered. My current glasses are missing an arm and I look like a Picasso painting when I talk to clients

Sometimes I hold really cute shit at work

Not even close

a couple of green birds are standing next to each other in a hole in the ground . ALT: a couple of green birds are standing next to each other in a hole in the ground .

Last night I dreamt I had 3 exotic birds instead of just one. I didn’t even take melatonin, the fuck? Would you still be my friend if I was 3 birds deep 24/7, everywhere I went?

Why do the loud ignorant chatty women always end up being my trainer? Dont greet me with happy patriots day then talk about how bad you feel for Charlie ks family. Shut up bitch

It’s really annoying that my late cousin has to share a death anniversary with Charlie Kirk now

Found a new way to get both my urge to write and to get my petty energy out in a helpful way- writing scathing complaints about corporate places that are neglecting their employees with poor work conditions. Feels great

a cartoon drawing of spongebob flexing his arm ALT: a cartoon drawing of spongebob flexing his arm

Making my first Saturday at the new job my bitch, really enjoying it

I got my first paycheck, not feeling like a useless poor loser anymor

So on top of being MAGA, my brother is now a proud transphobe and homophobe. So I am now proud to announce I have no longer have a brother- fuck you Dean!

a person 's hand is reaching for a piece of chocolate on a wooden table ALT: a person 's hand is reaching for a piece of chocolate on a wooden table

I’ve got that itch to perform again but…. Burlesque?

a small white dog with a heart on its chest is standing on its hind legs ALT: a small white dog with a heart on its chest is standing on its hind legs

I start my new job tommorow, and I had $10 off at the dispensary when I went for the first time since September. Things are getting better ❤️‍🩹

a man is laying in a bed with a lamp on the nightstand next to him ALT: a man is laying in a bed with a lamp on the nightstand next to him

I got a new job and last night for the first time in a month I slept in comfortably.

a man in a suit and tie is running down a street in front of a fence . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is running down a street in front of a fence .

Friend PLEASE INVITE ME TO STUFF THIS FALL/WINTER. My social battery can only operate below 75 degrees, I’ve been a hermit since may and I’m going stir crazy

a man in a suit and tie is smiling . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is smiling .

Ever since I got my appetite and taste back I’ve been craving pepperonis, garlic, pickles, vinegar, green salads, and tea with lemons. I think COVID made me Italian

I can’t stress this enough- COVID never left, it gets stronger with each year. Please protect yourself with masks and booster shots, I don’t want to see anyone I love suffer ❤️‍🩹

a man in a white shirt and tie is standing in front of a classroom talking to a group of students . ALT: a man in a white shirt and tie is standing in front of a classroom talking to a group of students .

I could’ve been working at the humane society for $4 more an hour?!? I bet their hq doesn’t have MAGA flags either unlike k……

Thank you internet for telling me salty/sour stuff helps with nausea. I finally was able to eat today

Just woke up from what I can only describe as a 4 hour dream, that shit was cinamatic

I miss food so much