Byron Magrane

This press release right here will capture the lost generation of baseball fans.

“Bermuda?
Jamaica?
Herschel Walker’s gonna take ya
Aruba?
Bahamas?
C’mon pretty mama
Key Largo?
Montego?

Walker is the ambassador to Kokomo. Great nation Kokomo. Strong. Fun. Many people say it’s a place you wanna go to get away from it all.”

Your ode to Ms. Pac Man was spectacular.

Just through business dealings.

Yeah, I’m an Unc.

An uncut gem.

I have crippling anxiety, completely self destructive and highly annoying. And like Adam Sandler, I’m born on September 9.

None. Unfortunately.

A vote for me is a vote for more public nap rooms.

More public places should have nap rooms.

I get daily emails from Panera (I have no idea why either) and it’s from the address MyPanera.

Every day I think it’s from MyPantera and I’m like, “why are they emailing me? I don’t like them that much.”

And then I think the same thing about Panera when I realize my mistake.

Wouldn’t that be “meow, meow, meow …”?

I never owned a cat so I don’t speak their language. Apologies for any offense taken.

Three games against the Rays are not televised. TBH, I don’t blame the Sox.

The Rays. Woof.

I’m m writing a screen play, should I have the sassy nun character say:

“Your head is up your ass but you still can’t see shit.”

Or:

“Your head is up your ass but you still don’t know shit.”

This is very important.

Happy Birthday!

He may not have an idea of where he is and what he’s doing on Super Bowl Sunday, but his signature is top-notch.

He definitely spent a long time on perfecting that.

@daveholmes.bsky.social as a huge fan of your Sudden Impact and MTV podcasts (as well as Truu Stoway), anything new coming soonish?

“Robble, robble. I saw Grimace on the island, through my mask, with not one but two underage fry girls. Robble, robble.” — anonymous whistleblower from page 1354.

I see we found where 1980s rocker Don Dokken does his laundry.

(This joke would’ve killed at my high school back in 1989.)

I pledge my undying allegiance.

1. Billy Joel
2. Rush
3. Tool
4. Aerosmith
5. Jay-Z (I find him really mush mouthed)

Do you know how much shit I get for telling people I don’t like Billy Joel (the artist — the person seems okay)? It’s like I kicked everyone’s dog and grandma.

It’s good to know there are others out there.

The penultimate card I needed to finish my 1986 Topps set. I spent all summer looking for him and Cardinals reliever Jeff Lahti.

I may not know where my keys are right now but I’ll never forget those two guys.

For Liam.

Yesterday, five-year-old Liam and his dad Adrian were released from Dilley detention center. I picked them up last night and escorted them back to Minnesota this morning.

Liam is now home. With his hat and his backpack.

Mario Mendoza. But we have to pay half of Hicks’ contract.

“THAT’S WHAT THE CLOCK IS FOR!”

They once showed movies on that forehead but now he has an even
more demeaning job.

I’m glad we decided to combine all of the Januarys into one long month so that we’ll never have to do this stupid month again.

Because that’s the only reason why these last 29 days have been taking an eternity.

Really? I’ll take your word for it.

I thought for sure he’d sit out his day as a protest if elected. And I wouldn’t have been surprised if he asked for his name to be removed from the ballot.

I’ve noticed that sometimes BB can be a bit over dramatic. 😊

@chadfinn.bsky.social Assuming Belichick is elected to the HoF next year, what are the odds that he attends the 2027 ceremony? 50/50?

This is awful news. I enjoyed Dan’s pieces a lot on Defector and Deadspin. RIP.