Freddy Dunning-Kruger

Screenshot of the infamous scene from Half-Life 2 where the jackboot thug in the gas mask demands that you pick up the soda can he just knocked onto the ground.

*tinny, garbled voice* "Pick up that Subway sandwich, citizen"

Some of these dummies'll spend months studying a spreadsheet to minmax a build, but are somehow instantly incapable of applying the same energy to their personalities. Being social has too many variables, it's too uncontrolled an environment. Whole lotta words to say: they're afraid of winging it.

No doubt. Video games and internet arguments tend to give a false sense of mastery over something, making them so much easier than like... I dunno... developing socially and growing as a person, which leads to meeting more ppl & heavily boosts your chances of meeting a woman who's interested in you.

Wonder when the "daring escape" and "disappearance" are scheduled for.

I like how he says, "A Biden DOJ would probably arrest *me* for saying this should be looked into," all speculatively as if we didn't just wrap a 4 year term where they were "looking into" all kinds of absurd shit to try to impeach him and all he did was almost fall asleep at the debate.

That was mine. I never give myself enough credit. 😭

1st Place: Leggplant
2nd Place: Foot Squash
3rd Place: Toebergine

the old american dream is dead. the new american dream is finding a job where you don't get bothered for anything most of the time so you can get better at all the cool shit you learned during covid.

3-panel meme in the "Say the line!" Simpsons format: 1st panel: Netanyahu's head superimposed over Mrs. Krabappel's, children in the class looking toward the camera with the text, "Say the line, Donny!" 2nd panel: Screenshot of an ABC News headline stating "White House says Iran could produce a nuclear weapon in 'a couple weeks'" - below is an image of Donald Trump's head with a sad expression, superimposed over Bart's head. 3rd panel: The class erupting in laughter, led by Mrs. Krabappel/Netanyahu, while Bart/Donald sits at his desk looking down sadly.

Chronicles of Narnia, but instead of a wardrobe, its a rusty old fridge at the city dump.

But they do that, too, anyway, because they don't actually know what any of these words mean. It's all the same word! Words are hard!

The simpler version of this is the classic, "Everything I don't like or agree with is Marxism."

Hope that helps! 😁

It's more fun when you operate from the position that all "Lip Reader Reveals..." articles are actually written by people working on behalf of the person/people allegedly having their lips read in order to misdirect from, or obfuscate, what was actually said.

I finally got it. Tim Pool is real life Dwight Schrute.

Thinking about how cool it would be if my fiancee drew blood for a living so I could walk into the room she's in and he like, "Well, well, well if it isn't my phlebottom bitch!"

A screenshot of the "Qualifications" section of a LinkedIn job posting, but the formatting is badly mangled causing anywhere from the last 1 to 5 characters from each line to, instead, be prepended to the following line

The only thing missing from the rest of this job posting (which is formatted just like this) is a bullet stating, "Attention to detail is STRONGLY preferred."

This is actually not uncommon.

Damn, has it been almost 2 years, already? Thoughts and prayers to his family. Never forget. We must continue fighting for answers.

Damn, for a second I thought it was a podcast about engineering disasters focusing *on* slides and... well... it sounded like a fascinating but very shallow rabbit hole to go down.

Tonight, they will burn bright, releasing their Holy Smoke into the air in preparation. This ritual will be repeated every night until Conclave begins.

THIS IS TRUE CATHOLICISM. THESE ARE OUR TIME-HONORED TRADITIONS.

It looks like you made it just in time for this evening's burning of the previous 266 popes in effigy. There they are, in all their glory, 266 popefigies in the center of the massive pope formation, woven out of reeds, waiting to serve their purpose.

... while tonight's chosen cardinal, wearing a head dress of vibrant red cardinal feathers and rotting fish heads, drives a staff into the ground to the rhythm. Clad in loincloths and miniature pope hats, each cardinal is covered head to toe in body paint matching the colors of his magical House.

It starts as a distant rumble, but as you near Vatican City, it becomes clear that what you hear is dozens of male voices rhythmically chanting "CONCLAVE CONCLAVE!"

As St. Peter's Square comes into view, you bear witness:

All 135 cardinals holding torches, arranged in a giant square formation...

now how am i supposed to get my super premium... *checks notes*... uh... black... uh... market... fentanyl-laced... uh... tyle... nol?

"the president is a dumbass, ancient boomer who doesn't understand shit about shit in this newfangled modern world" and "the president is trying to blatantly gaslight the country in the most easily debunked way imaginable" are now officially indistinguishable.

a man in a purple shirt drinking from a blue mug Alt: Danny Tanner, holding a periwinkle mug up to his face while smirking and wiggling his eyebrows smugly like he just made a point. In the background the set of the kitchen from Full House.

Show me where Joe Biden saved a whole 1/3 of the country from overdosing on fentanyl. I'll wait. You can't.

Quite simple, really. Roy Cohn's wretched soul got turned away at the gates of hell and needed a place to crash.

MAGA: Fully committed to making outrageously confident stupidity the US's main export.

👊🇺🇸🔥, etc, and so forth

Vague Tim and Eric vibes.

If the phrase "good sir" didn't appear in their post, I'm not sure it even counts.