Adam

Your reality will be crushed when you are handed a price sticker machine for your job at the Dollar Store.

I'm sorry I dulled you with repetition, redundancy, and duplication only to then say the same thing over again.

On your date tonight, just say you need to go to an ATM so he can invest in crypto for you. It's the best way to go home.

I realize I’m carrying this conversation at least one too far but I have Daedalus, Challenger or Sieve729. Hard to be relevant to modern audiences and potentially in the future. Sorry and thanks

Before you sell that fake velociraptor skeleton, be aware that when they figure it out, people will ask where the bones came from.

I totally agree and see your point. I just assumed it was the writer having fun foreshadowing. Pandora seems too on the nose, so I’m not sure my pick would be. Thanks. That gives me a fun puzzle for my commute.

You couldn’t get behind a bad containment strategy reference?

Just imagine the exposure and reach Raphael would have gotten if he had added that ad for Marco's Ferrier Services to The School of Athens.

Why is a bird in hand worth two in the bush? Having a live bird in my hand sounds terrifying.

It makes me happy you wrote this. Playing along, can I add, eating a jumbo slice sober?

Keeping quiet hasn't camouflaged your strangeness. Instead, try body paint to blend into your surroundings.

It’s excellent and everyone should get a copy if they want to know more about immigration or just love centaurs.

All sense of mystery you tried to create will disappear as TSA pulls down your pants.

Cartoon fish playing a shell saxophone

I always thought this guy had an altered state of consciousness.

You'll blush when the doctor calls you cute, but you'll realize they're referring to an acute infection.

Don’t forget to scream at the squirrels like Gollum. “Stay away from precious!”

You'll destroy your enemies by releasing YouTube videos stating germ theory is a hoax and bringing back bloodletting.

With a bit of pluck and a lot of determination, you can get the last reward points needed for a free sandwich.

I got nervous, and to calm myself, I tried to imagine everyone in their underwear, which was pretty easy to do on the beach.

Having flowers delivered to random houses signed "Love, Matt" is one way to increase the dating pool.

If the Sword of Damocles falls, is it a reportable workman comp incident? Asking for a friend.

So quick to love, impulsive, and a creator of chaos?

You are happy to find a job filled with exotic travel and interesting people. You just don't know about the retirement package as a drug mule.

The key to regularly going to the gym is to find a trainer to give you Stockholm Syndrome.

You are in charge of your own happiness, but the permitting process is nearly impossible.

Your family is sick of all the sacrifices you make for work, but mainly because of the mound of goat carcasses.

@miriamjayaratna.bsky.social that’s how it works, right?

You are just one more med away from inner peace.

Your belief that you only get what you can handle does not account for cosmic typos.

Predestination for the win