getting in drag tonight so there’d better be cameras there (unless i look bad, in which case i’m crawling into the melbourne’s intricate sewer system and never returning)
1 glass of house sparkling is about to change my world
i may have only moved an hour away from melbourne city but that’s not going to stop me from complaining about it and lying telling people that i live in amish country
good morning i’m going through every moment in which i’ve fumbled a guy but with voiceover and silly sound effects like it’s australia’s funniest home videos
you know what…
was about to ask when twink week was but we have nothing to be proud of
how would one go about getting a job being a tour guide in melbourne, but it’s just cruising spots, gutters i’ve passed out in, and gay saunas?
nobody knows this but if you connect all the moles on my body with pen it spells out fiona apple’s poem “when the pawn”
solo volta listening party commencing
you’re right lemme treat myself to a cycle
getting signs from ig that i need a big dumb boyfriend (bodybuilder content)
have kinda come around to the state of my teeth. love having giant crooked teeth kinda. gnashers. fierce. intimidating. i might bite.
still giggling to myself about the cbat situation
girl on real housewives of melbourne complaining about the western suburbs oooh i need to go to pride of our footscray to offset that dig
tried one of the wraps they sell at work and why do people keep on buying these they taste like indifference and malaise
you’d go and you’d meet up with the girls at r*inbow, and then all of the drag queens would be at millie’s, then you’d go back to r*inbow after a quick foiré at your yia yia’s, then an hour back to the station, take the last coach home, then walk home, and be up in time to do the open at the café
now you see, the best day to go out was a thursday, i’d walk an hour to the train, which would be another hour to the city, and then i’d walk another hour to sm*th st-
talking myself through the way i used to go out two-three years ago but in my elderly nursing home voice
if i chose a different name i think i’d choose “b” and all of my friends would know me as “b” and they’d wonder what that was short for, agonise over it, imaginations constantly running wild, until one day i relent after their incessant requests, i’d pull out my id and it would say “bea”
some people disagree, or sneer at my morning ritual of chugging a redbull upon waking up, but it’s the only way i can get the ball rolling, and by ball i mean my heart, and by rolling i mean experiencing moderate-mild palpitations
just experienced the same where’s my birth certificate panic but for the photos of the back of my retina
thinking of becoming more nonbinary as a response to the rise in f*scism, i’m different
still not over telling the girls that i was kept down a year in primary school and their response being “that makes sense for you”
unfortunately dropping out of things last minute has had nasty consequences (not getting invited to things)
just south of the scenic suburbs of brooklyn and tottenham
we need to find someone who will be willing to make a wig out of the remains though cause i can’t commit to that
been locked tf in to minecraft i can’t lie
i don’t think there’s a way in which i can talk about being mistaken for a trans guy in dating situations without it potentially being problematic but just know that i love you boys
