Starfish Who Can’t Think Something Witty

May we have some pictures?

one of my tumblr mutuals cross-stitches her favorite posts and i feel like we're just a few steps away from a bayeux tapestry of the 00-10's

If literally nothing else changes except him never saying another fucking word again, it’ll still be one of the best days of my life.

Things will get better, worse, or stay the same. That’s the best I got.

I don’t think he serves a full term. He is visibly deteriorating, the Epstein shit isn’t going away, the economy is in the shitter *before* the AI bubble bursts, he’s surrounded by schemers and incompetents, and the best card he’s got is “ain’t it weird the starfish owns a few modest skirts?“

I mean hell, if she has handcuffs, pray to God in His throne that she’s a fed.

The 22 year-old who genuinely does want in the pants of a 56 year-old anarchist before committing a terrorist attack is quite frankly far worse for you than a cute fed.

Also, bluntly, sometimes a realistic appraisal of your age, socioeconomic status, appearance, and personality is in order when a 12/10 fresh out of college is *so interested* in your political opinions and/or Warhammer models.

Counterpoint: The armor of contempt is a survival skill in this age.

I stand corrected.

no idea tbh

People will play Disco Elysium once and decide to get their philosophy from the world as seen through the eyes of a self-loathing mentally ill hobo.

You’re afraid they’ll train AI on your posts because you are weak. I, a genius, post so badly that every word is a blow for mankind in the Robot Apocalypse by making the machines dumber and shittier.

“Yessir, the stocking budget really is quite essential for this op. Kimberly wants to meet in person and spill the tea on - Oh, it’s a metaphor sir. Don’t worry about it.”

Pitch: Hallmark Comedy about a fed who gets her egg cracked infiltrating Big Trans (TM). Her final report simply reads “the girls are fighting.”

Workshopping a joke about Donald Trump making Christmas more expensive because he loves fucking kids. Feel like it would do numbers on resistlib Facebook after Thanksgiving.

If you were to ask John Roberts to name five policy outcomes he disagrees with but are nonetheless Constitutional, I’m not sure if he could do it.

Terra Invicta

Listen, there are only so many easy control points with launch capacity and nukes so humanity is just going to have to learn to love the Israeli-North Korean alliance if it wants to survive this alien invasion.

Israel gets busted spying on its allies in the computer game Terra Invicta.

Life imitates art, I guess.

He’s exactly as he is presented onscreen in Phantom Menace, but in-universe he has the political reputation of, like, Talleyrand.

Jar Jar retires a month before ANH, with the Emperor then declaring with the absence of his old friend he cannot see a purpose to the Senate any longer. He is held up of an icon of how the Empire is in no way speciesist, look how high he's risen!

At no point should he ever face karmic retribution or indeed be cognizant of having done anything wrong at all.

I dislike this. I think Jar-Jar should have retired in luxury after a lengthy career in the Senate as one of the “Naboo Mafia,” be granted a dukedom by the emperor for his services to the Empire, and spent his elder years dabbling as a part-time centrist pundit in the New Republic.

More than fair, honestly.

Would create a fun mini industry of pundits diagnosing the national mood based on what were the top 5 vote getters

I think the United States Supreme Court should have new attire designed annually and decided via popular vote. If they are politically immune to democracy, at least let me vote to put them in chicken suits.

You okay?

If you hold a crab up to your ear You can hear what it's like to be attacked by a crab Image of an impressive orange crab, the Sally Lightfoot crab, Grapsus grapsus, a shore crab that lives from the Gulf of California to the Galápagos Islands.

I remember last time I gave it a spin Ye Olde Prussian Meatgrinder with the DDR is the only thing I could get results with anyway.