John Poster

If I need to hire a software engineer all these silly technical tests are irrelevant, the only qualification is if I can see the pain in their eyes and then I know they are the one

Test driven development is a psyop

If I was rich and famous I would spend all that money on a bunker in new zealand so I could hide from the poors

If you were to ask me what my favourite programming language was I would say none of them because they’re all shit. Except nobody would ever ask me this question because i’m weird and unapproachable and also smell like someone who wears the same superdry hoodie every day of the week

Effective Java: Second edition did untold damage to humanity and we never quite recovered

We’re so concerned with whether AI can pass the turing test we never considered if a javascript developer could pass it

As a comedian myself I must make a 17 hour skit about being cancelled by the woke mob

If you think about it a comedian who makes nobody laugh is still an impressive achievement

I am intimidated by Holland and Barret stores

The 2000s were filled with many innovative software ideas such as, what if we made facebook but for dogs however it was not very successful as a niche offshoot of something that already existed was silly. However Ive cracked the code… just eat but for drugs

If you think your code is bad you are correct it is bad. If you think your code is good you are mistaken its even worse

The difference between a java developer and a python developer is a java developer revels in near infinite lines of boilerplate whereas the python developer points at an empty file and exclaims “pythonic” and clocks out for the day

Is Kojima made out of Kojima particles?

I don't know what I am doing

Just generally

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[ #art #krita #digitalart #artist #originalart #oc #originalcharacter ]

I got a printer where the magenta isn’t running out

I need to like 10 posts to train the algorithm so what happens if i like my own posts

I have never eaten cereal for breakfast its always a very good bedtime snack however

I bought a gundam and I’m yet to put it together

The interesting thing about being a software developer is that I spend a lot of time building nothing of value

IBS is a thought terminating cliche

The most interesting thing I have ever done is disassociate myself into an out of body experience while my boss is driving down the motorway at 100mph in some shitty Jaguar in absolute silence with no radio. The things i did for less than minimum wage.

I remember the wise adage I would hear often at school

“Your mums your dad and your dads your mum”

I think about this often

Would I gain followers if I posted a picture of my butthole?

I made an application called the curator and everyone found it very funny

This is an inside joke you wouldn’t get it.

I never got suckered into manosphere content cos I remembered by parents are completely swagless which means I have nothing to worry about

Myself

The loneliness pandemic can be cured by drinking colloidal silver but Big Pharma doesn’t want you to know that.

I myself covered myself head to toe in beef tallow and now I have loads of friends

Working class solidarity is impossible because my colleagues are very annoying

Really sad today cos I lost my best friend.

What happened was he came over and my cat was sitting on my chair and he said “why don’t you just move the cat?” And unfortunately I had to put him down after such a diabolical question.

Rip

Gamers typically do not play games