@mayonnaisehands.bsky.social
Middle aged single parent of two cats and one husband.
Not wearing a shirt or a tank top under a sweatshirt feels illegal
22.11.2025 22:59 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0This food is so good it has me critically thinking about the spice trade
22.11.2025 05:14 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0THIS SUPREME COURT IS SO WEIRD
22.11.2025 01:38 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0We are a no shoes household and sometimes socks are a fucking prison
22.11.2025 01:35 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I had two toasted slices of my sourdough for dinner and then washed my face for like 10 minutes.
Sometimes things are good.
November 16, 2025 - this year's first Mariah Carey
17.11.2025 02:09 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0What's crazy is Trump doesn't drink or do drugs. He's doing a sax solo on Clinton off a diet coke and lime
- Danny Goodwin
You mean to tell me that Ptarmigan starts with a P?
16.11.2025 03:11 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0"The doctor said it was the best result he has ever seen as a doctor."
16.11.2025 02:34 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
Being reluctantly loved
15.11.2025 23:27 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0If you'd only ever seen Benicio del Toro in Excess Baggage and then watched One Battle After Another I bet you'd be confused
15.11.2025 23:18 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0Two Time Loser Cuomo
05.11.2025 04:29 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0February 11. Never forget
04.11.2025 21:02 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Fuck Dick Cheney. Rot in hell.
04.11.2025 16:29 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
This little man kills me
03.11.2025 04:59 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0I desperately wanted to ask my dentist if he dreams (has nightmares) of disembodied mouths and or teeth but I figured it was inappropriate
25.10.2025 00:01 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Robin Hood confirmed that I was A. attracted to a cartoon and B. not a furry
24.10.2025 04:39 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
20.10.2025 20:35 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
20.10.2025 20:35 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
20.10.2025 20:34 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
20.10.2025 20:34 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
One C-3PO Lego from my nephew 13 years ago (a leg just fell off the other day)
20.10.2025 20:29 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0One 2009 MacBook hinge (I was a Genius during their Quality Program [recall] and I would do replacements constantly. I stole enough hinges for each Genius on my team because they make the best keyring)
20.10.2025 20:28 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0One 6.35mm Phone Connector that was my grandmother's retirement gift from working as a Telephone Switchboard Operator
20.10.2025 20:28 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0One purple non load bearing carabiner that I lifted off of my YMCA sleep away camp Director
20.10.2025 20:27 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 1 📌 0A short, sentimental list about Key Chains by mayonnaise hands
20.10.2025 20:27 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 4 📌 0If you don't think Afghan Hounds look like Judith Light we can't be friends
19.10.2025 22:46 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Did anyone ever realize that Ash Ketchum's last name foretold his future? He had to Catch 'Em all. Get it? Katchum. Catch 'em.
19.10.2025 18:59 — 👍 0 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Are people really out here raw-dogging YouTube?
18.10.2025 21:43 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0Turning off uBlock Origin and refreshing a YouTube page is fucking frightening.
18.10.2025 21:42 — 👍 1 🔁 0 💬 0 📌 0
