Tara Persaud

a man in a suit and tie is making a funny face with the words whyyyy written in yellow ALT: a man in a suit and tie is making a funny face with the words whyyyy written in yellow

Emma: “She doesn’t think Bartleby has long left.”
NOOOOOOOOO!
#TheArchers

a group of men in red robes standing next to each other with the caption " our three weapons are fear and surprise " ALT: a group of men in red robes standing next to each other with the caption " our three weapons are fear and surprise "

Brian: “The only way we’re going to do that is though ruthlessly efficiency.”
#TheArchers

a close up of a man 's face with his mouth open . ALT: a close up of a man 's face with his mouth open .

Alan: “I think I can see Nathan Boone looking disgruntled about his limp cucumber.”
The SWs are mining a rich seam for innuendo.
#TheArchers

a woman holding a large zucchini with the words it 's gourd season ALT: a woman holding a large zucchini with the words it 's gourd season

Asra: “Turns out he was suffering from toxic squash syndrome.”
This might be the most Archers-sounding thing I’ve ever heard. #TheArchers

a man and a woman are dancing on a stage in a black and white photo . ALT: a man and a woman are dancing on a stage in a black and white photo .

Alan: “I’m a sucker for Ginger.”
Ok, two questions - who is Ginger and will she have a speaking part.
#TheArchers

a woman in a pink dress is sitting in a chair with a sign that says be ALT: a woman in a pink dress is sitting in a chair with a sign that says be

Lynda: “When do I ever berate you?”
#TheArchers

a woman says it 's very expensive with a candle holder in the background ALT: a woman says it 's very expensive with a candle holder in the background

Tracy: “Do you fancy dessert? I’ve got a lovely pud from Underwoods Local.”
Underwoods Local?? Is she made of money??
#TheArchers

a close up of a tree with lots of leaves on it ALT: a close up of a tree with lots of leaves on it

Fallon: “Garden’s gone a bit wild since Harrison’s been away - went to town on the hedge.”
You needed have bothered, Fallon - rewilding is back in fashion 👍
#TheArchers

a woman is taking a bath in a giant champagne glass ALT: a woman is taking a bath in a giant champagne glass

Tracy: “I could have done with a lazy morning, not sweating it on me own doing cricket tease.”
Cricket tease is the phrase ascribed to all activities engaged in during the period immediately preceding said cricket.
#TheArchers

a man in a suit and tie drinking from a glass ALT: a man in a suit and tie drinking from a glass

Jacob: “Which reminds me, there’s a a donkey with thrush waiting for me.”
TMI #TheArchers

a woman is standing in a living room with the words " curl mirror look at it " ALT: a woman is standing in a living room with the words " curl mirror look at it "

Brian; “Loyalty, cooperation, communication - means nothing to Justin!”
Err, pot/kettle much? Siobhan - need I say more? #TheArchers

a man wearing a black t-shirt that says oh my ALT: a man wearing a black t-shirt that says oh my

Brian: “It’s all about the moisture content.”
#TheArchers

a man with a beard is sitting in front of a clock and says " you 're just the worst " ALT: a man with a beard is sitting in front of a clock and says " you 're just the worst "

George: “I can’t give it to her, can i? You get the ring and give it to Amber.”
George is VILE.
#TheArchers

a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk and saying sucker ALT: a man in a suit and tie is sitting at a desk and saying sucker

Akram: “She’ll understand, won’t she?”
#TheArchers

mr. burns from the simpsons is sitting at a table with a piece of paper in front of him . ALT: mr. burns from the simpsons is sitting at a table with a piece of paper in front of him .

Justin: “The profitable side of rewilding!”
Cut maniacal laughter.
#TheArchers

a man in a suit and tie is talking about the meaning of the word ' is ' is . ALT: a man in a suit and tie is talking about the meaning of the word ' is ' is .

Martin: “There is absolutely nothing going on between me and Annabelle Scrivener!”
#TheArchers

a woman in a dirty shirt is holding a white object ALT: a woman in a dirty shirt is holding a white object

Will: “It’s clean enough.”
This sentence always means it’s not clean at all.
#TheArchers

a woman is standing in front of a sign that says `` all the good men are in jail '' ALT: a woman is standing in front of a sign that says `` all the good men are in jail ''

Susan: “She’ll soon realise marrying someone who’s been in prison is not such a great idea.”
If it’s not been a dealbreaker so far I wouldn’t hold your breath.
#TheArchers

a man is stirring a pot in a kitchen with the words stir that pot written below him . ALT: a man is stirring a pot in a kitchen with the words stir that pot written below him .

Lillian: “Oh mum, what were you thinking - everything is such a mess.”
Peggy was the OG stirrer.
#TheArchers

a woman says " it just doesn 't make sense " ALT: a woman says " it just doesn 't make sense "

Amber: “I’m Amber. Pleased to meet you.”
Things young people say on The Archers they would never say in real life number 36283.
#TheArchers

a woman wearing a camouflage jacket is smiling for the first wives club advertisement ALT: a woman wearing a camouflage jacket is smiling for the first wives club advertisement

Joy: “I’m sure you can talk to Usha as a friend.”
If Usha spoke to all her Ambridge clients “as a friend” she would likely be the only destitute solicitor in Borsetshire.
#TheArchers

a man in a tuxedo stands in front of a microphone with the words that 's life behind him ALT: a man in a tuxedo stands in front of a microphone with the words that 's life behind him

Clarrie: “Why is it the minute I think I’m settled I have to start all over.”
That is a little something we tweetalongers call LIFE.
#TheArchers

a man in a suit and tie has the words stop it above him ALT: a man in a suit and tie has the words stop it above him

Kirsty: “This is where our new beaver enclosure will be. It’ll need a lot of fencing.”
Dear Scriptwriter, please see below.
From the Tweetalongers
#TheArchers

a yellow cat excavator is digging a hole in the sand ALT: a yellow cat excavator is digging a hole in the sand

Alan: “If anyone would like to add some earth as a final farewell, please do so now.”
#TheArchers

elmo from sesame street is standing in front of a wall of flames . ALT: elmo from sesame street is standing in front of a wall of flames .

Alan: “I’ll do my best to give her the funeral she deserves.”
Dragged to hell, as a bitter, vengeful, spiteful person ought to be?
#TheArchers

a woman in a blue tank top is drinking from a mug ALT: a woman in a blue tank top is drinking from a mug

Kate: “I’VE KILLED HIM!”
The real question - was it death by massage or by boredom?
#TheArchers

a woman sitting in a church with the word amen on the bottom right ALT: a woman sitting in a church with the word amen on the bottom right

Alan: “You got on alright with him, Kate?”
She admirably restrained herself from jumping his buff bones, so you could say they got on.
#TheArchers

two men are fighting in a boxing ring with arabic writing on it ALT: two men are fighting in a boxing ring with arabic writing on it

Crispin: “We should box sometime - it’ll get you closer to God.”
Yeah, Alan - when he knocks you out and takes your parish.
#TheArchers

a man in a black jacket is standing in front of a computer screen . ALT: a man in a black jacket is standing in front of a computer screen .

Tom: “It’s not the weather, it’s not the seaside, it’s us - the sewage farm!”
#TheArchers