✨𝘼𝙪𝙜𝙪𝙨𝙩 𝙎𝙠𝙮✨

Everyone is fighting a battle you can’t see and I want to remind you that you are important. You are loved, even when you feel you aren’t. The space you take up in the world has purpose and it takes time to find it. Any step in any direction is movement and should be celebrated.

Suicide hotline:988

watching my last sun set. My drive to just try may stumble and falter but I’ll be DAMNED if I stay down. So I’m not good, but I’m okay. Just catching my breath~

2.) I’m okay. Physically. I am strong willed and more stubborn to not give up or give my in to some of the darkest thoughts I’ve ever had. I know they aren’t normal and they should be red flags, but all I can do is fight this thing alone. I’m more interested in seeing the sun rise tomorrow than —

1.) if you reach out to me and I don’t reply, it’s not that I don’t want to talk to you. I do. But I’m struggling heavily with my life right now and sometimes the prospects of certain types of conversations only add more stress to me as I feel there are expectations.

— from my recent failed relationship. The state of the world is also just fucked and that weighs on me heavily.

I say all this for two reasons:

I know there are medications out there to help, but I left my job a while ago due to downsizing and lost insurance with it. I’ve been struggling even more as things around me are piling up. Homework, home damage from the snow, working retail to put myself through college, and dealing with new trauma

I’m starting to become late to every function, not because I don’t want to be on time, but because I’m loosing large chunks of time in the day. I’ll zone out thinking 5mins has passed and it’s been 30mins.

Responsibilities are piling up and I struggle to find motivation to do even just simple things like sweep the floor. I often now will start my car to go somewhere and sit staring into nothing dissociating until I snap back to earth and remind myself I have places to be.

Getting out of bed is getting harder, video games are loosing their appeal, holding conversation is getting heavier, and the things I’ve done to spark that joy I’m getting burnt out on. Generally, I’m finding myself to be burnt out on a lot of things in life.

Some days the fights are easy. I wake up motivated, with drive, passion, ambition, and an optimistic pep in my step. Some days it’s a struggle to get out of bed at all. For a few months now I’ve noticed it’s getting harder and harder to win some of these fights.

For the past two weeks ~or so~ I have been floundering to hold onto anything that distracts me or numbs my brain. Meaningless conversations, working out, video games, or copious amounts of weed. I’ve been fighting inner demons for years and every day is a new battle with functional depression.

CW: Mental Health

Firstly, I would like to say that I’m safe and not a risk to myself or anyone around me. This one may be long, so I’m sorry.

So when you can’t do that, you just get really high, watch Zootopia 2, and pretend that nothing else is going on. The world has just stopped spinning and you are granted a moment to catch your breath before the inevitable sharp cold stabs your lungs again.

Feeling that deep psychological need to just go. Go somewhere. Anywhere. Start over.

Gotta warn a pup before ya hit em with this view. God damn!

I give up tonight.

🤫

All clean from my shower. Now. Who wants to get dirty?

More nudes and fun on telegram: t.me/+O6eNWQtHxDE...

Well. Hello there. Looking to get comfortable tonight?

Off-the-Clock Heat

the struggle is real

I think that this should be perfectly socially acceptable

Service dog reporting for booty!

bro... hey bro what if we touched noses.

Rainbow sherbet is the best

👀👀👀
Woof~ 🤤

You know what they say about 20 bucks

dont run big boy

Wag wag wag

Get in here cutie. Could use a cuddle pup ;)