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i just don't understand why it feels like nothing ever works out for me.

why don't good things happen to me?

like i literally worked for that company for two years?? if they chose someone else, they're going to have to train them from scratch.

i'm pissed off about the job thing because why wouldn't they hire me when i already have the training?

ngl idk if i've forgiven myself for spending all my savings back in 2023. i managed to save 7k and ended up spending it all :/

once we pay off holly's medical bill, we won't have any money left in savings lol

do you really care about your stuffed animals if you don't talk to them and kiss them

to all 12 of you who actually see my posts here: hi

today feels like a complain on alt day

also the job i applied to never got back to me so that's cool

i wish i could have tolerated working long enough to have earned the money needed for holly's surgery. but fuck that place, the management sucked so bad.

my solution to being stressed about money is to spend money and it's very counterproductive!!

i'm free from work hell

i keep having money dreams

i am going to quit as soon as i fucking can

i am a glutton for punishment
(picked up another shift at work tomorrow after already working four days this week)

angry at the state of the world at 9am

i dont get paid till next friday either.

i don't want to become someone who asks for money from others all the time, but money is so tight right now that it's hard to get groceries and pay off bills.

seriously wish i could go back to sleep, but my brain had decided that we're up for at least a few hours.

or playing league of legends lmao

everything lately either pisses me off or stresses me out and the only solace i have is talking to oomfs

i work from 2-9pm today like why are we waking up at 7:30am

i seriously hate having adhd because it took me at least three hours to fall asleep. my brain wouldn't turn off, and then i only slept for four hours.

i cant even pretend that i'm okay. i just feel like i should kill myself

(i obviously won't but please just let me be dramatic)

i'm only one day off for taking my meds and i'm crashing out this fucking hard

punched the door six times and had a fucking breakdown because i missed a dose of meds and my mom triggered a breakdown about work

me two days ago: i'm so glad i'm normal now
me today:

holy fuck i hate being alive

i don't think we'll be getting anymore money thru holly's gfm. i'll have to work hard to earn the rest. sigh.