Microplastics Sommelier

Woke Presents: Wobbs and Shawk

you thought 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 was "cancel culture"? get ready for woke 2, bozos

this is what they took from you

it’s amazing hearing them cast around trying to figure out who could be inspiring all the “agitators” and “organizing” them. is it walz & frey? is it a liberal conspiracy? where is this outrage coming from?! it’s like a drunk guy trying to find a fire alarm with a low battery.

you're gonna be rich!

and you're right to say it

remember when there was a real gun emoji and apple was like wait people are using this emoji to rob banks and kill hostages lets make it a water gun to stop the crime

it’s a very cool art form which is also pretty niche since it requires tons of specialized stuff

my cousin used to do it semi-professionally and made us an extremely cool mirror once

good news!

oh?

Communications Director Perez, Marie Gluesenkamp - Rep. 5 days ago APPLY VIA EMAIL C apply before March 21.2026 The Office of Rep. Gluesenkamp Perez (WA-03), the Administrative Co-Chair of the Blue Dogs Coalition, is seeking a Communications Director to join her official staff. This position serves as a member of the senior staff team, working closely with the Member, Chief of Staff, Legislative Director, Operations Director and District Director to develop and execute an external communications plan that effectively communicates the unique district and messaging of Rep. Gluesenkamp Perez. This role oversees all press relations, an active social media operation, speeches, Franked communications, newsletters and all other communications needs of the office. This position is expected to work non-traditional hours and to regularly travel between DC and southwest Washington. Position can be based in the District or DC office. Essential duties: • Implementing the Congresswoman's communications strategy, including earned media coverage, overseeing a strategic mass communications plan and executing an effective social media plan. • Serving as the formal spokesperson and media liaison for the Congresswoman. • Drafting speeches, press releases, media advisories, talking points, op-eds, newsletters and statements for the Member based on her existing and evolving positions.

i could fix her

mama mia!
👩‍🍳👌

sounds i-talian

(winking) goodnight hotdish

weeder you son of a bitch, you've done it again

Long driveway piled to the side with snow

Me watching beautiful snow: Haha fuck yeah!!! Yes!!

Me shoveling: Well this fucking sucks. What the fuck.

Sheriff Jesse Watts-Retired • Follow 3h Being called a "boot licker" and a "Nazi" in my D... See more "BOOT LICKER" AND "NAZI" IN MY DMs? DISAGREEING WITH YOU DOESN'T MAKE ME A NAZI. REFUSING TO KISS YOUR ASS DOESN'T MAKE ME A BOOT LICKER. THINKING FOR MYSELF DOESN'T MAKE ME YOUR ENEMY. SORRY IF THAT HURTS YOUR FRAGILE LITTLE FEELINGS. I DEBATE • I DON'T GROVEL • I WON'T APOLOGIZE. NOW SCREAM LOUDER, MAYBE IT'LL MAKE YOU SMARTER.

big strong men are coming up to me with tears in their eyes and saying that it's unfair how mean people are being to them on facebook. they're saying thank you for giving me the chance to show my strength by telling everyone that it doesn't bother me.

A reminder to the news media: “conflicting accounts” is what you say BEFORE the incontrovertible video evidence appears. After that, your job is to ask why one side is lying, not to repeat the lie and pretend no one knows the truth.

Nothing can prepare your soul for the first image ever transmitted onto a television

"The Virgin Secret Police Fan VS THE CHAD Freedom Understander: Virgin: No need for a warrant, sir, come right in The officer must have felt he was in danger ICE are just doing their jobs I've been given a lawful order Sounds like they didn't comply They need to wear masks or else the libs will doxx them If a protestor gets in the way, it's their own fault Chad: I live here, I'll do what I want I know my neighbors, I don't know you Am I being detained? Gun? None of your business but I know my rights Come back with a warrant I don't need to show you ID to walk down the street

know the facts

a bottle of tequila called QUITA PENAS

listen i’ve been trying but they keep pulling me back in

i've got a hunch

"The Virgin Secret Police Fan VS THE CHAD Freedom Understander: Virgin: No need for a warrant, sir, come right in The officer must have felt he was in danger ICE are just doing their jobs I've been given a lawful order Sounds like they didn't comply They need to wear masks or else the libs will doxx them If a protestor gets in the way, it's their own fault Chad: I live here, I'll do what I want I know my neighbors, I don't know you Am I being detained? Gun? None of your business but I know my rights Come back with a warrant I don't need to show you ID to walk down the street

know the facts

weekly facebook checkin didn't disappoint

his DMs are a smoldering ruin

Sheriff Jesse Watts-Retired • Follow 3h Being called a "boot licker" and a "Nazi" in my D... See more "BOOT LICKER" AND "NAZI" IN MY DMs? DISAGREEING WITH YOU DOESN'T MAKE ME A NAZI. REFUSING TO KISS YOUR ASS DOESN'T MAKE ME A BOOT LICKER. THINKING FOR MYSELF DOESN'T MAKE ME YOUR ENEMY. SORRY IF THAT HURTS YOUR FRAGILE LITTLE FEELINGS. I DEBATE • I DON'T GROVEL • I WON'T APOLOGIZE. NOW SCREAM LOUDER, MAYBE IT'LL MAKE YOU SMARTER.

big strong men are coming up to me with tears in their eyes and saying that it's unfair how mean people are being to them on facebook. they're saying thank you for giving me the chance to show my strength by telling everyone that it doesn't bother me.