holydongbird

my new hobby: looking at shitty sensei wolf wattpad covers and laughing my ass off so hard i forget i’m writing a glorified choose your own adventure reader insert.

what if instead of programming this i cried

aaand... miss.. elle woods. who was kind enough to send in a HEADSHOT.

i've been hearing "hedgehog" ALL THIS TIME. AND PICTURING HER MAILING THEM SONIC. lmfao.

i REALLY like ben platt's music

DONT HUMOR ME WITH KIIIIINDNEEEEEESSSSSSS!!!! THERE'S NOTHING KIND ABOUT A HUNDRED SMALL BETRAYAAALSS!!!

OH YEAH. let's go.

"yknow johnny... ive always taken it easy on you... because i had a soft spot for youbutthingschange."

this line delivery is SO confusing, lmfao.

hi bluesky. if nobody is going to listen to me on twitter dot com i will at least "tweet" into a vacuum where i can be unashamedly prissy and loud. anyways, i think we deserved to walk sensei wolf like a dog on a leash. WHAT! who said that.

"What's the matter, John? You lose something?" #CobraKai

That’s more like it.

i love this omg. i'm just locking in and turning all my assignments in and in the bg i just hear "hey have you heard of gloria estefan?" "no i only really listen to bad bunny" HSKDJFSKGHSDLGKDFNSGKJDGNDGN CRYING

gfadkjfsgflshjh WHO IS THIS QUEEN IN THE SCIENCE BUILDING SMALL TALKING THE JANITOR AHAHAHAH????????

omfggggg WHYYYYYYY ARE WE DOING THIIIIISSS

I had delicious hashtags for breakfast

Ladies and gentlemen: we did it

this happens to me every saturday. i do this every saturday guys. haha. hahahhahahaha

bruce springsteen put CRACK into cover me and YALL WILL SLEEP ON THAT SONG LIKE IT'S A COLD PILLOW!!!!!

john kreese is a different beast bc wdym his senile ass is getting it up and trucking on with the power of cigars and karate. and maybe a thing of whiskey or two. good sir what the fuck

(tory nichols voice) im done. IM DONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!

"Sensei Wolf? You sent this thug to kidnap me? Why?"
"Because, Danny boy... what would life be without a few surprises?"
#CobraKai

listening to the audiobook version of waxing on (ralph's autobiography): he goes into SO MUCH detail about how they did the fly chopstick scene and it's SOOOO FUNNY HAHAHAHA

2 am bagel so yummy MMMM i love 2 am bagel. yum!

i felt really bad, so i bought an extra thing of pity oreo cheesecake (it was super good.) and told him to round it up so i could only get the bills and he didnt have to worry about coins. a hundo bill was all i had on me 🫠 I SALUTE YOU!!!

when i have my dink (dual income no kids) (okay, maybe dual income one cockatiel, but i dont think dioc sounds cool) i’m gonna have that cool bookshelf tv panel. to put all my books in. guys i love bookshelves guys guys guyss guyssssss

i don't know, i like the washington post's new motto

my order was 25 bucks, if you wanna giggle.

TWENTY FIVE. AND I HANDED HIM A HUNRED DOLLAR BILL.

(laugh. PLEASE DO. I'M FUNNY.)

"are you chill with taking a hundred?" i tell the sad cashier guy who really really is NOT chill with taking a hundred, but nods.

i love you. thank you for the banh mi.

lol I GET IT!!! + it feels like throwing my thoughts out into the void lol

so many linkin park songs off minutes to midnight are kreese coded and i LOVE IT.

not that i dont love buck hahaha i love buck. but RYDER… THE DADDY A N D MOMMY ISSUES…..