zoe

*Checking whether I looked hot in 2016*

"Wake up people, this meme is a trick to train the algorithm on aging patterns. I refuse to participate".

sometimes I think 12 inches could fix me

and by that I mean a subway veggie patty footlong, they're SO good

invisible string, fishing line, same thing...

if you ever see "zoe is typing..." for five full minutes and then it stops and there's no post, it's because I am stupid and depressed and don't know how to words

some people really do choose to be a moderator so they can be mean!

I'm gonna miss you me at six so muhuhuhuch 😭

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH

I may have put a $100 note in my bra for nye and things are already looking up. it hasn't even been an hour, lol

did anyone else get ten mozzie bites for christmas or just me?

it's finally hit me after three years that holidays with divorced parents and adult siblings with their own families is a fucking ordeal lol

The secret to surmounting Mercury retrogrades is to find that one song that triggers your unbearable ancient nostalgia and listen to it on repeat until it feels like you’re on acid

completely forgot about the other nickname that also applies... and then I looked up high school guy's natal chart (I think) for the first time......... how have I now picked FIVE MEN with their moons conjunct (or near enough) to my own, this is stupid

shit, I think I'm gonna have to revive the "pretty boy" nickname that we used for my high school crush

finding my twitter mutuals on bluesky is like finally finding ur friends at the club after being separated for an hour bc chaos ensued somewhere on the way to the club

my phone autocorrected “legendaries” to “legend aries”? alright, you’re an aries stan, good to know

yup, we dipped our cucumbers in tomato sauce 🙈

show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this show less like this

This idea that getting into arguments on Twitter is somehow noble and valorous instead of a waste of time using a text equivalent of a Call of Duty lobby is pretty funny

why does this site think I'm into an*me and f*rry art................ how do I unsee what I have seen?

back in my day, we needed an invite code to make a bsky account
(I've been here for ages, hi)