Alex von Tunzelmann

TV conspiracies: we’ve hacked their computers but they’ve perfectly cleaned up the evidence!

Real conspiracies:
To: conspirator
From: famous person
Attachment: evidence.png

seeing how many people show up in jeffery epstein's emails makes me happy i never reply to anyone's email

CLAIM: The government is run by a secret society of pedophiles
RATING: FALSE. This society is in no way a secret

We really need to start asking who paid off his debts again

What a great day for finding out that a lot of things people thought were conspiracies are actually backed up by emails that are like hey pedo, let us pedo together in pedoland on the second day of the pedo month

pretty funny in retrospect that QAnon hinged on the idea that powerful elites at the highest levels of government were smart enough to talk in code when sending emails to each other about their despicable crimes

the newly released Epstein emails are getting coverage on Fox News 👀

I’m at the Epstein Files
I’m at the Russiagate
I’m at the combination Epstein Files Russiagate

Follow Up: Why was this being discussed in the situation room?

comic strip with call and response text. who are we? CEOs what do we want? AI! AI to do what? We don't know! When do we want it? Right now!

every company in 2025

Once again, if you wrote a story in which the jetsetting corrupt FBI chief took a government plane to the "Boondoggle Ranch" an editor would tell you to get a different job, because you're not cut out for writing believable stories.

I’ve had several of these & have been wondering the same.

Nine years left till the copyright runs out!

Fine, I will write the next James Bond.

INT: SEX CASINO, NIGHT
BOND: Hello I am Bond James Bond my car goes NYOOM
CUT TO: ten minutes of a chase in a sports car
BOND: Also my watch is a special watch that makes ladies blouses see through
EXPLOSION
BOND: This film is for grown ups

A dead parrot with only nine years left in copyright! Well, I suppose they can afford it.

Though how I’d love a scene in which Christian Bale had to explain all seriously how he’d put that jackass cartoon shit behind him

Yes, this is the sensible head-canon

Sometimes the long arcs of telly work brilliantly, though: Buffy at its best (S3-4 for me) did this really well, as did The Wire, Mad Men, and many soaps. But in films there’s just much less scope for that, and Bond has never really even tried.

If you slice him, he’d just be all liver. Like a sausage

Right? And I’m just not sure audiences will be happy if they go to a Bond movie thinking “the one thing that really matters to me is that all of this should make sense” bsky.app/profile/jkac...

Completely.

Honestly, most of the Bond films barely even manage an internally consistent narrative. Though if Bond really is supposed to be 95, I’d love to hear from his cosmetologist, his yoga teacher, and from whichever unfortunate doctor has had to deal with his doubtless many cases of the clap

Goodness me. I had no idea the Bond movies were supposed to form a coherent narrative from 1962 till now. This raises quite a few other questions.

Obviously Nick is right in this thread. Problem solved, martinis all round 🍸

The truth about impartiality at the BBC And the hysteria of the current "crisis"

The reaction to the Panorama edit has been nothing short of hysterical. Yes the BBC has some impartiality problems. But its biggest isn't the one you think.

New piece from me.

open.substack.com/pub/goodalla...

Statement from the Mayor of London: Many Londoners are horrified by the ongoing genocide in Sudan, which has claimed at least 150,000 lives, displaced millions, and created the world’s largest humanitarian crisis. The videos and images of mass killings circulating online are truly harrowing and heartbreaking, as are the horrific satellite photos that have emerged in recent days. Accounts from survivors that sexual violence continues to be used as a weapon of war - including against children - are deeply distressing. These are crimes against humanity, and the international community must act to ensure they are urgently stopped. This senseless violence and suffering has to end. The world must not look away from this crisis. MAYOR OF LONDON, SADIQ KHAN

The world must not look away from the genocide in Sudan.

there's a moment in PARADISE LOST where Satan arrives in Eden and realizes Hell isn't a place; it's a thing he carries within him and it'll follow him wherever he goes. and i think about that when i see these awful rich men whose monstrous wealth has enriched them not at all

r/ExpectationVsReality u/Additional-Simple858 • 3d Join Al 'doctor' said my back pain is depression, not a slipped disc. Now physical therapy won't get approved. Al Expectation We are reviewing claim #& submitted on 09/28/2025. Our records indicate the claim was filed under diagnosis code F32.9 (Depressive disorder, unspecified), while the corresponding prescription and referral history list treatment for lumbar disc herniation (back pain).

Re: Incorrect Diagnosis in Record Hi Thank you for reaching out. We have reviewed your visit documentation and can confirm that the notes in question were generated using our Al scribe system. It appears the Al tool assigned diagnosis code F32.9 (Depressive disorder, unspecified), while your visit notes and treatment plan reference lumbar disc herniation (back pain). Per compliance policy, certain Al-generated fields cannot be manually updated by clinic staff and require vendor correction. We have escalated this to our vendor support team and opened ticket # . We'll notify you once we receive confirmation or correction from the vendor.

a few months ago I said "having generative AI handle absolutely anything with regards to healthcare is a nightmare and should be banned" and a bunch of people made fun of me and called me stupid. anyways,

If you click on the post I embedded, it’s a reply to a post with a screenshot of JCO’s tweet in it. Or you could just look all over Bluesky tbh

Not only that he’s daft, but that he’s a bit dense, inadequate and boring. Deep down, he knows these criticisms to be true, which is why they hurt so badly.

Yes, the fact he’s adored by an army of absolute losers just makes it even worse for him, and I think that’s beautiful