David Mayo 🦜

You couldn't make a song like "Queen of My Double Wide Trailer" today, because of rising housing costs.

Dozens.

"havve you tried having a bilion dolla ars and praying on runways ? "
"run away"

Installing Docker on Windows makes it look like you're about to hit a paywall.

Photo of the door of a U.S. Army recruiting office that reads "More than 150 ways to be a soldier."

You just carry a pack, Jack
Make battle plans, Stan
You can seek and destroy, Roy
Just get yourself free
Learn how to cuss, Gus
You don't need to discuss much
Study artillery, Lee
And get yourself free

Fetterman, or, The Modern Prometheus

This is the best possible outcome in a chess game, because you just know the other guy is absolutely steaming behind his computer somewhere. This is so much more viscerally enjoyable than actually winning a game.

The chess positionn 1k1B4/3K4/1BB5/8/8/8/8/8 b - - 37 91

There is no better feeling than when you have a losing position in a chess game, your opponent gets mad at you for not resigning, and they attempt to showboat instead of just checkmating you, and then they screw up the win.

Many have said similar things about me.

GOOFS: POSSIBLY INTENTIONAL ERRORS BY CHARACTERS: Due to its subject matter, the novel really should have been called "Bride and Prejudice."

This shirt would fix me.

Is Neelix as detestable as I've been told?

Starting a Linux consulting gig and calling it "cron-sulting."

You should get banned for saying someone should be put in a wood chipper. That seems reasonable.

Evil Marine colonel/Avatar hybrid guy: I came in like a wrecking ball.

The chess position r7/6p1/1pk2p2/1p1p2p1/2pPpP1P/PPP1P1P1/2K5/R7 b - - 0 28

Pretty sure this was a new endgame for me: R+8 v. R+8.

Eight year olds, Dude.

I need a jeevacation@gmail.com **from** this jeevacation@gmail.com.

A rat done bit my pedophile
With whitey on the moon

Every single time! Epstein will write:

"porsecters h4arrsed me w/ sbuopenas al bcuase tr4ificing myners .due porcess much???no"

and then there's, like, the former president of a university or white house counsel or something replying:

"You're totally right, and also I love you with all my heart."

[Youth pastor voice] "You know who else could be saved by Romans?"

This post is inspired by, but not in direct reaction to, the new Epstein emails.

You can configure Outlook to make all of your outgoing emails be "high importance."

Any person who does this is The Biggest Asshole At Work. I have never, in my entire life, known a single exception to this rule.

These are just comically incriminating. Good Lord.

Saying this in the "Game over, man, game over!" voice.

The James Bond people could always just remaster "Goldeneye" and put that in theaters. I'd watch it.

Jose Chung's To The Moon

large 20-foot tall concrete lined sewer tunnel. in the distance three people stand with head lamps on their hard hats, looking toward the camera as they stand in ankle-deep water.

if you can’t see the aurora borealis tonight, here is a sewer tunnel which is a wonder in itself.

Go look at the sky! I can't see shit, but go try!

Man in Air Force uniform giving a thumbs up and holding a protest sign that reads "More pay!! from the USA."

And who could forget this banger.