Tupelo

Maybe I should step back from social media from a bit to improve my mental health.

Seeing him listening to b2b by Charli xCx makes me feel sad. I don't want anyone else, just you. I want to come back stronger.

Almost been a full month since I last heard his voice, miss him

Therapy's helping. Wanting to move on from my past issues and focus on the present. Hoping it's not too late.

Got back from my first shift, definitely feeling really tired.

Missing him everyday.

First day of work today (for real this time)

I'm so sad that he's not in my life right now. That he's not officially mine. I wanted to move on, I really did from my past. However, it feels like it's too late. He's distancing himself from me, to move on from me. Now, I feel like I moved on from my past too late. Shit hurts.

I feel like I barely have anything left to keep me going. I won’t die, but just feeling demotivated heavily without what I had.

He said he'd talk to me again when the time is right. What could that mean though.

When he's healed, I've healed, or we both lost the love we had for each other. I hope it's when both of us healed instead.

Thinking about 2025:
-Lost my close friends.
-Had a relationship that I really wanted and lost, twice.
-Don't know when or if he'll come back.
-Lost my freedoms in my home.
-Lost friends
-Lost family.

But hey, guess I'm still here. Hoping somehow I can save the relationship.

I wanna go back in time where I didn't fuck up everything. He would still be here, we would be in love, and the future would look so bright together.

I see him posting about Dispatch, I wish I can gift him the game. At the same time, I know he needs time and space and I'm trying to respect that.

Miss him heavily still, I really hope I can salvage the relationship in time.

I love it when my dad threatens to cut my food when I'm not doing job searching at the exact moment he walks in my room 🫠

Apparently it was just paperwork

Came to the ballpit gym under infurnity hotel for photos, but ended up becoming part of the ballpit experience instead.....

Wish me luck fellas.

I still hope that when this blows over, I get to call him mine and for him to call me his.

First day of work tomorrow!

Feliz día de muertos

Went to therapy again today, changes are gonna be made

A year ago I got him dragon age for Halloween. He was so excited and in love with me. I hope I can still do things like that for him

are you falling in love with someone else? is there room in your heart for me still?

I fought so hard to win him back just to lose him again…

I got therapy and psychiatry set up.
Hoping I can show you all that I can be a better man.
Missing him a lot too, still hoping somehow I can salvage this, but I don't know.

I’ll always love you, Newt
I still want to be your man

Whoa, my love, my darling
I've hungered for your touch
A long, lonely time
And time goes by so slowly
And time can do so much
Are you still mine?
I need your love
I need your love
God speed your love to me

I miss him

it's stupid of me to think this was going to end any other way.

this is officially one of the worst fucking years of my life.