The Phantom of the Mead Hall Bard

I averted my gaze.

No idea. Don’t know the fella.

a black and white photo of a man with a stethoscope around his neck screaming . ALT: a black and white photo of a man with a stethoscope around his neck screaming .

Probably the maggots.

No idea.

Hemorrhoids.

But you do piss on lamp posts.

Massive turds.

Can strip a moose carcass to the bone in fourteen seconds.

Can you see the connection here?

Porridge.

bsky.app/profile/them...

Never mind. On the plus side, you’ve got a staring role with Dick in my latest rhyme.

A highwayman known as Dick Turpin.
Consumed strong ale by the firkin.
When he grabbed Mead Hall Wench.
She knocked his meal of the bench.
And got Curry Sauce on her Merkin.¹

Thank you, thank you. I’m here all eternity. *bows*

¹ The fees were astronomical.²

² Also, Mr Pip went berserk.

I thought that when they yell "Jeezus H. Christ" 🤣

They sell then to dark magic sorcerers "Eye of newt, Toenail of Wülfhelm..."

I hesitated TBH. But given that you’d asked.

So. Because I struggled to find a single word that would describe the Handyman’s character, I went searching T’internet.

I found ‘Adorkable’ 🤪

Apparently, it means adorably awkward.

Ye gods, I’m glad I’m not an author. *picks up guitar*

I’m not the best touchstone for the genre, or indeed literature, but here’s my ‘opinion’.

I got the ‘Rom’ loud and clear from the front cover but not ‘Com’ element. I got the humorous hints from the back cover synopsis.

I don’t know how I’d change that though. Maybe hint at it in the strap line? 🤷‍♂️

Don’t be. They are only opinions. The only thing you have to factor in is whether the cover will attract the audience you’re targeting and that’s just business.

*whimper*

I thought they were evangelical meetings? There were lots of screaming ‘Oh God’ happening.

a close up of a man 's face with a beard and long hair Alt: A close up John Snow 's face with a beard and long hair.

Winter can Fuck Off!

Nah. Didn’t over do it. Eventually got tired and went to bed around 12:45

Careful, or you’ll disappear up your own arse in a putt logic.

Well then: You think, therefore, you am.

Do you think?

You are not being obtuse, but rather, contradictory.

Not got to that bit yet.

The first two episodes were OK. I'm gonna push on with it. Can't hide from life.

Vera could take both of them 😂

Ah. 😬