April Wolfe

tech bro: i have made Artificial General Intelligence

programmer: you fucked up a perfectly good calculator is what you did. look at it. it's got anxiety

This urge is universal.

The Sagittarius urge to tell everyone it is my birthday and the Midwestern urge to tell every restaurant it is my birthday to see if there are free desserts have converged.

Hey is anyone familiar with Chinese nonprofits in Los Angeles??? I got a friend who wants to partner with an org for a Chinese new year benefit but she’s newer in town and needs some intros.

Oh my god yes this is exactly what I was talking about with regard to the parenting recipe blogs with disgusting AI photos!

This is perfect!

It’s my birthday! I’m gonna do something cool and human today like read a book and go for a walk! Do something cool and human today!

I don’t go on X but I am very curious about the Chotiner thing with Semafor. Is there a write-up anywhere?

The ARod doc is… I understand why he is the way he is but I also just don’t like the way he is.

hey Los Angeles, are you mayor-curious? check out @cartermoon.bsky.social's new substack about why he's all in for Rae Huang in 2026! ☀️

(FYI, Carter is part of the genius behind @raeforla.bsky.social's lit campaign launch video!)

I've been thinking about this for hours now. We need to take all his money.

when the austeritarians have lost their flagship revanchist

It'll just be easier if you wear the clothes you want to be buried in when you fly.

Man you don’t even need to be an expert. I rewatched that old Enron documentary a few weeks ago and was like oh that’s how AI is cooking the books.

Using Grok to do a vulgar roast of people at the party with forbidden words.

Don’t read that movie list. Don’t do this to yourself. The year is 2025 and you are beyond bad lists.

Thanks NPR!

Photo of actor Udo Kier as Hans in MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO

Photo of actor Udo Kier as Hans in MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO, holding a lamp up dramatically illuminating his face.

I was the assistant editor on MY OWN PRIVATE IDAHO. I have 9000 stories from that time, and many of them feature this man who passed away this morning, Udo Kier. He would talk about Fassbinder, Warhol and Paul Morrissey for hours. I was so lucky to get to know Udo and he will be missed by so many.

She would have been a good woman if it had been somebody there to shoot her every minute of her life, Charlie Brown.

Why are they hanging out at a car dealership?

Udo Kier in Swan Song turned out to be one of my favorite Udo performances and is a beautiful and funny meditation on death if you’re in the market for an Udo you might not have caught.

Lol new Elsbeth making fun of Katy Perry for stealing a church and killing that nun.

YES

Ian Miles Cheong: Everyone must go back to the country where they are born. Please don't tell people I'm living in Malaysia, where I was born, but spend my entire life complaining about America.

Ian Miles Cheong: *has been secretly living in Dubai this whole time*

I'm a COOK, he's her LOVER
she's my WIFE, there's a ROBBER
I'll make you feel ashamed
cuz I'm Peter Greenaway

Highly recommend getting your friends together to karaoke Lilith Fair songs A+++

Do I understand correctly that there is now a dispute within the administration about whether this "peace plan" was written by Russians or Americans?

evergreen

Welp

Ok fine who has the screenshots?