@shmaesh.bsky.social
Adult Human Criminal ne/nem/nir
He liked her way better than I did (I hate a wire-hair, sorry. Her name is Saturn tho)
22.02.2026 01:51 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I showed him the dog of a man I have not yet met during the amuse bouche course lmaooooooo
'I swear I won't be dating while we're having fancy dinner but do you want to see a DOG?????'
The SIGH I just sighed jesus
22.02.2026 01:46 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Perf I'll have places to stay. I gotchu, love
20.02.2026 22:43 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I'll do it for you where does he live
20.02.2026 22:34 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0oh my god lol
20.02.2026 22:32 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0And who aren't nickel and diming me about every goddamn thing that's ever happened. That's also p fucking great
20.02.2026 22:26 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I'm not one of those 'buy me shit' partners, really, but having a couple people who want to have experiences with me and who say yes to me is AMAZING
20.02.2026 22:24 β π 4 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0love you
20.02.2026 22:01 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0sometimes it's just too much
20.02.2026 21:44 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Excited to get taken on a shockingly expensive date tonight.
The difference in how I'm being treated by partners in just one year since walking out of my marriage is staggering
what's the ld50 on banana bread?
20.02.2026 21:10 β π 1 π 1 π¬ 0 π 0I would NEVER have guessed what kind of native mammal is being called vermin here holy SHIT
20.02.2026 21:14 β π 8 π 2 π¬ 0 π 0Butterfly in the sky
I can fly twice as high
You're my butterfly, sugar baby
Come my lady, you're my pretty baby
I'll make your legs shake
You make me go crazy
I'm in
20.02.2026 21:11 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0shoutout to every single person i follow who is into men because 100% of them are down to blow a garbage man mid-shift and i genuinely think that rules. if anyone deserves head it's them.
20.02.2026 16:18 β π 12 π 1 π¬ 3 π 0I think I have it too
20.02.2026 21:02 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Too broke to afford a slave or a wife at all. Nothing at all to offer their victim but a whole 99 theses of demands
20.02.2026 21:00 β π 4 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Samesies
20.02.2026 20:54 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I have been SO lucky in this regard but I definitely still can't have close relationships with people who have rape hands or say rape phrases or touch my rape feet
20.02.2026 20:53 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0
A portrait of Agnes Sorel from the 15th century. She has a huge veil pulled back from her face and is dressed in a black gown specifically designed to showcase her favorite (left) titty, which is accentuated by the white lining of the bodice spilling out
Glad I pierced my nipple because now I get to spend the next five weeks carrying on this queen's legacy
20.02.2026 18:51 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0cream of grinch
20.02.2026 18:28 β π 27 π 4 π¬ 0 π 0he let me hit because i said pleeaseee please please please until i threw up in front of him
20.02.2026 17:27 β π 177 π 37 π¬ 4 π 0shout out to the stranger who accidentally scrolled my feed instead of their main feed for what appears to be *some* time yesterday lol. Love you
20.02.2026 17:51 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0samesies
20.02.2026 17:51 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0
Just walk out skeleton meme If it sucks⦠hit da bricks real winners quit
important reminder for any remaining government lawyers staring down this nightmare case load:
real winners quit
no babe iβm not horny i just need you to put your dick in me for medical purposes
20.02.2026 17:23 β π 87 π 12 π¬ 1 π 0The deer are staring at me accusatorily
20.02.2026 17:02 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Johnson was absolutely correct about only one single thing in his miserable, shitty, hateful life and it was that you can just choose not to listen to injunctions and no one will stop you. It would have behooved the rest of us to also learn this
19.02.2026 19:59 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0
