Maura ミ☆ 🤍🤍

Hardware store car Mr Potts stares sadly at a sign banning him from the local music store. He is innocent of any crime, and wishes only to be pet

Possibly the saddest picture ever taken, right here in Takoma Park

An American pope just sounds wrong. That should not be allowed.

here are some good creatures (not an exhaustive list):

* raccoon
* capybara
* chinchilla
* autism creature
* axolotl
* always sunny danny devito
* bird

he wants me snack

Sadly, Jack Smith will dismiss the election subversion case against Trump-there’s no choice. Trump vowed to fire him; the DOJ would have dropped it; Internal policies prohibited it; and The Supreme Court effectively made him immune. It’s a sad day for justice. He is in fact above the law right now.

Someone called this mass exodus from Twitter ‘the fall of the Broman Empire’ and I died laughing. 💀

Bilbo lies in a shrimp formation on his mum's chest as they both lie comfortably on the sofa. His eyes are closed, happily saying "big boys have big hearts"

big bboys ... have big harts

Math problem. I have three apples and am traveling towards you at 17mph. It's not really a problem, more of a warning. Apple time, bitches.

Fishtopher, a classic brown tabby cat with green eyes, laying on a navy blue cat bed. He looks at the camera with friendly, green eyes. He has an almost humble expression, ears slightly down but still facing the camera. He has many whiskers coming out of his face, including a prominent sprout by his eyebrow.

just a comfy guy

an orange cat is in a semi-dark room with a TV on in the background. he is in a little loaf shape with his paws tucked neatly under his chest

I don’t mind watching television, I just prefer shows where I won’t learn anything new and fucked up that just happened

forgetting your headphones at home is the modern equivalent of leaving your sword behind in medieval times

This is Loki, our Border Collie

anyone else's "discover" page just CATS CATS AND MORE CATS

“Everybody who leaves Twitter lives in a bubble. They don’t want to interact with people who have thoughts and values that differ from their own.”

Listen buddy I’m just trying to escape the sex bots

A photo of Bilbo's huge face as he slowly pries his eyes open from a deep slumber. His face is out of focus as if he's on a cheap webcam. He says "Awake, unfortunately"

awake . umfortunately

Yeah same 😂

cat: *unresponsive*

bartender: get this catatonic

And then the rest is just more endless blue checks since other replies don't get seen bc of those stupid checkmarks.

It was bad when the new blue checks were introduced but it normally didn't take long to scroll past them. Now the blue checks are so bad and clearly botted you can't scroll past them. Even if you sort by most liked tweets, it does nothing bc any tweets written by a human only have about 100 likes

It's strange being able to actually read replies again. I'm so used to quickly scrolling to get past all the spam that I'm constantly scrolling back up to read the replies since they're actually written by real people. It's such a relief ngl 😭

there is nothing cats love more than sitting on the thing you are looking for

I would buy your entire stock

Fishtopher, a classic brown tabby cat with green eyes, sitting in a green froggy cat bed in a window. He looks at the camera with a neutral but alert expression. His ears face forward and his nose is very pink.

he makes a good point

Bilbo the cat loafs on his cat tree surrounded by catnip leaves, some of which are stuck to his whiskers. He says "Hello! Can I have a kiss please?"

helo ! can i have ,a kiss pelase

Bilbo lies in bed with his big head tucked into his upturned paws as if pressing them into his face. He groans "oaghhe"

oaghhe

A close up of Bilbo's extremely round orange face as he dries off from the rainy outdoors, looking smug. He says "I am going to cause problems on purpose.

i am going to make problems ...on purpise

Bilbo sits up on the kitchen floor looking up inquisitively past the camera, suggesting "It is maybe... time for a Saucer of Milk?"

its is maybe ?? time for a Saucer Off Milk