Mered1th

Sometimes a convo on one app turns into the kind of conversation you’d usually have on another app. Do I switch apps to continue or are we going to keep talking about it, here, where I doom scroll? When is the appropriate point of a trauma dump to start sending you a ‘real or cake’ video?

1. Trying to find a navy blue tank top in November is impossible.
2. Speedwalking through the mall on a weekday evening is actually pretty great exercise and got me to my step goal. Maybe it’s time for me to let go of my mall-walker grudge.

Franklin College

Sweaty banjoist/singer sticking the pick to his sweaty forehead for a verse is a real ACL vibe.

🦶 🩹

What if I’ve only been paying 99¢/month for several years in a row through ✨magic✨. I feel like that’s got to be costing them money.

a man says it 's a tricky one on a blue background ALT: a man says it 's a tricky one on a blue background

Two truths and a lie but it’s the Jeopardy contestants introducing themselves.

My senior cat has recently learned that she can get my attention by stepping on the ceiling fan remote control when I’m trying to go to sleep.

Make your own art dude. The muse is within.

🧿

It’s super cool how YouTube will put an ad break IN THE MIDDLE OF A GD SONG

Devil Wears Prada but I fast forward through the parts where her boyfriend and friends are total assholes.

Sleeping in the guest room just for fun. It’s a lot warmer in here than in my bedroom.

49D33-2310-OV-035048 i read the case history and figured out why.

Well that’s the end of an era in Irvington. What is he selling it for?

No one is talking about how mattress commercials show people doing normal mattress activities in normal bed settings but there are never sheets on the mattress. I mean, I understand they are trying to sell the mattress, but it’s not realistic. A child and a dog on an unmade bed?

Charms don’t work on snakes because they have no ears.

The engraving on the headstone will be a burnt cd mixtape. Or a QR code for your final Spotify playlist.

The scene in Oklahoma! where Curley tries to convince Jud to kill himself is macabre af.

Same except on PBS.

My goodness. It’s been ages. I posit the last GASC was Pineapple Express.

Maybe the only good reason to get married again would be so I don’t have to be the one who deals with spiders.

Stevie Nicks staring directly at Lindsey Buckingham, with her back to the audience during the 1997 live recording of The Chain, while she sings, “And if you don't love me now, you will never love me again.”

Point of pride: hacking hotel thermostats to go below 65.

Looking for that one black piece of clothing in the pile of black clothing.

Doldrum is a word, right? Or must it always be plural?

I am 40 years old and my parents are still my emergency contacts.

Don’t feel like cooking? Try three or four tiny pickles and that last piece of turkey. #lifehack

Things I adulted today.
- scheduled my first mammogram
- started my application for a fellowship and a second master’s degree

Adding insult to injury, my bag of cough drops makes an identical crinkle to the Temptations package.