Merry Frizmas

Release the Epstein Files, but only as an illustrated Where's Wally style activity book.

Becunt he's a cause

I released them - into the bin!

In the style of - hear me out here, Sooz, because this is the first time a fan has suggested this to you - Liza Minello!!

Release the Epstein Files, but only as an illustrated Where's Wally style activity book.

Just had a vision of Tennant popping up in Russell Tovey Fucke a Fysh to say some bollocks like "Alonso?! Ah, no, of course, it's a metatwinnening over the time flex via a multispace crack in the blindusphere. OKEY DOKEY ARTICHOKEEHHH!" or some shit

I just woke up and remembered Karen McDonald. Lovely girl I went to primary school with. She later joined my Scouts group. No weird sexual things happened because we were all 11. What the fuck are the Girl Guide organisers doing.

A promo for The Night Manager Series 2 where Tom Hiddleston looks a lot like Peter Serafinowicz

Introducing Tom Hiddleston as Peter Serafinowicz

A promo for The Night Manager Series 2 where Tom Hiddleston looks a lot like Peter Serafinowicz

Introducing Tom Hiddleston as Peter Serafinowicz

I just woke up and remembered Karen McDonald. Lovely girl I went to primary school with. She later joined my Scouts group. No weird sexual things happened because we were all 11. What the fuck are the Girl Guide organisers doing.

Two men? But I heard sources saying there were tree fellers.

❤️

Friz’s show was one of the genuine highlights of the Edinburgh Fringe - I’ve not laughed so much in an age.

Do yourself a favour and get a ticket - you won’t regret it.

It's International Day if Disabled Persons. Celebrate by reserving tickets to my Leicester Conedy Festival show where I talk about my three hospital visits within a year with bizarre ailments. (There is a spoiler for one of them in my profile pic so don't look).

STEVE HARVEY: something with 8 legs you don’t want to see in your bedroom
ME, BUZZING IN IMMEDIATELY: 4 men fucking my wife

Heat 2: The Heatquel

I temember the episode when Derek said this and then that Wires song by Athlete played

All I'm hearing is that you fell for an obvious AI video, was told it was AI and then didn't delete it immediately. Are the likes on social media really THAT important to you?

It must have been hard for Rowling to write the scene where everyone takes a polyjuice potion to look like Harry Potter without including "of course, none of them were biologically Harry Potter" after each paragraph.

My Top Songs playlist with Books from Boxes, Living in a Box and What's in the Box? hitting thr top three.

For the eighth year in a row, my top three most-played songs are Box related. Having a playlist for a box-related show that you host 25 times a year really helps with this statistic.

It's a bad show but it's also a scripted comedy airing on telly and we have to encourage that. At least it isn't a festive version of Comedian And Friend Renovate A House In A Hot Country And We Film It, I Guess?

I guess BBC One's 2024 experiment of "air good shows on Xmas Day" failed. Shame. Must have not liked having 20 Billion viewers for ten hours straight.

It must have been hard for Rowling to write the scene where everyone takes a polyjuice potion to look like Harry Potter without including "of course, none of them were biologically Harry Potter" after each paragraph.

The thing is with this nonsense is now my whole day is ruined. I have to sit by my phone until they call now. And if they don't? Who knows?!

Jobcentre were meant to phone me for my Work Capability interview and just... haven't? Can I sanction them?

ANIMAL CITY PLANNER: "We're gonna call it Zootopia. A Portmanteau of "zoo" and "utopia". Cool, right?"

ANIMAL MAYOR: "Very cool. Quick question - what the fuck is a "zoo"?".

Me: Hang on, let me just check on my step count

Dracula: Fuck you you're not my real dad

Oh, nightfall at 4pm now, is it? Cool. Cool cool.

"Fucke a fysh". Please respect the title of the show, which is Russell Tovey Fucke a Fysh.