If you're doing a costume for World Book Day surely the only choice is Atlas
The media is trying to make me feel sorry for the kind of British people who visit Dubai by choice
Hey gurrrrrl are you a western military intervention in the Middle East because you also seem like an incredibly bad, permanently damaging idea that reminds me of my early twenties
40th episode of the Quantum Leopard podcast w/ Kate Cheka is now out! A great conversation about the class war, getting railed in a chapel, and why 40 year old cis men are the Oxbridge of dating. Enjoy!
quantumleopard.podbean.com/e/episode-40...
TWO MINUTE FAVOUR! PLEASE vote for Quantum Leopard in the Chortle Awards, "Best live comedy format" - that's the one we won the last three years.
The link is here. Thanks loads in advance!
www.chortle.co.uk/news/2026/02...
White I think?
Hey everyone, tickets now on general release for our 11TH BIRTHDAY SHOW W/ THE CREATIVE MARTYRS, Sooz Kempner, Dru Cripps, Andy Barr and some lovely fives! Saturday 21/03/26:
www.ticketsource.co.uk/quantum-leop...
On train last night. An old woman was playing far right tiktok out loud on her phone. I politely warned her that her headphones appeared to have stopped working. She then mercifully stopped. Your mileage may vary. She's entitled to her own white noise, but not everyone else's.
Why do they call it a lamb and not a minibaa?
Okay, this is quite outstanding from Bedford Council.
Did Comedy Club 4 Kids today with 20 mins of Guess Who which was an absolute delight. I closed my set with a one Vs ten thumb war because I genuinely couldn't tell that some smaller children were standing up
Hello lovers and fighters. QUANTUM LEOPARD IS NEXT SAT and has @robinince.bsky.social @rachcreeger.bsky.social Caitriona Dowden & Fred Barber. Just 10 tickets left at time of writing, which is some, but not loads and loads, so hop on it if you're keen: www.ticketsource.co.uk/quantum-leop...
you're not the first person to say that to me today and you won't be the last
Aren't all tattoos temporary tattoos if you acknowledge your own mortality?
People assume Scooby Doo is male but they actually go by rhey/rhem
Hello lovers and fighters. QUANTUM LEOPARD IS NEXT SAT and has @robinince.bsky.social @rachcreeger.bsky.social Caitriona Dowden & Fred Barber. Just 10 tickets left at time of writing, which is some, but not loads and loads, so hop on it if you're keen: www.ticketsource.co.uk/quantum-leop...
Chester! Join us at @storyhouselive.bsky.social on Wednesday 18th for #halfterm giggles with @runitalwar.bsky.social, @jamesrosscomedy.bsky.social and Danny Pensive! Comedy! Games! Light ridiculousness!
🎟️ www.storyhouse.com/whats-on/com...
Coooo! Tonight at XS, it's the return of delightful pigeon-fancier Toussaint Douglass! Not only that, but also @androjonny.bsky.social, @jamesrosscomedy.bsky.social, sketch duo The Mayor and His Daughter, and our own fancy pigeon @tobyhadoke.bsky.social www.wegottickets.com/xsmalarkey
Reminds me I came up with this solution to the problems of the new economic model in the arts back on Twitter
The latest episode of the Quantum Leopard podcast with ALEX FRANKLIN is out now if you fancy it, really interesting set and chat about trans identity and zoology: quantumleopard.podbean.com/e/episode-39...
On almost everything – fraud, polarisation, radicalisation, misinformation – evidence suggests that over 60s are in much more urgent need of online protection and education than teenagers.
But that issue gets zero political attention, and is a total non-starter. Nothing good will come of it.
What's that you say, an excuse to post this story about Kisin again: www.chortle.co.uk/news/2018/12...
Maybe Keir Starmer *is* good policies. Like Clark Kent and Superman, have you ever seen Keir Starmer and a good policy in the same place at the same time?
It’s time to abolish tuition fees and cancel student debt.
Education is a public good, not a commodity.
Contrary to popular belief, cows only have one stomach. They only have four stomachs if you offer them pudding
UK PEOPLE: this is REALLY IMPORTANT. If the government bans under-16s from using VPNs, then logically they must intend to REQUIRE AGE VERIFICATION FOR ALL VPN USE. Which will affect adults too!
*Your* right to anonymous web browsing is at risk!
https://petition.parliament.uk/petitions/754408
these two old men used to sit with each other on a park bench near my house. same time every day, never spoke a word to each other. yesterday, I got there early and put a single chess piece on the bench. now one is dead and the other was last seen boarding a flight to minsk.
Go out with a bang, not a whimper. Because bangs are more commitment-minded.
look upon my works, ye mighty, and let me know what you think
SEVEN tickets left for the first QL of 2026 on SATURDAY 17/01/26 w/ @jlukeroberts.bsky.social @adelecliff.bsky.social @presidentobonjo.bsky.social Niamh Simpson,Zoe Brownstone & more inc meeee MCing
www.ticketsource.co.uk/quantum-leop...
As ever pay what you like & a lovely time!
