@thekarlapacheco.bsky.social
Comics, video games, and other artisanal lies for money. Made Spider-Woman throw a kid off a boat, put the Punisher in hot pants TWICE. I pronounce it "blue-skee"
A tray of cupcakes that spell out "We'll Miss You...TRAITOR" in frosting. Yes, I clearly did this by hand, and they're obviously salted with my tears.
"You still upset about your favorite bartender leaving?" "Nah, it's cool. I got cupcakes for her going-away party."
03.08.2025 00:21 β π 80 π 2 π¬ 3 π 0At pro club, yes! They even had a Pilates PT that was covered by insurance.
03.08.2025 00:17 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Not *quite* the same, and I talked about it on the old site, but Monkey Painting Money is still my shorthand for:
"Enough money that I could afford this thing I want (in this case a Victorian painting of a monkey from an antique shop in Chicago 25 years ago) without thinking/stressing about it."
Ebery one ob us knows that sharp beeling
31.07.2025 17:51 β π 7 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I said what I said
31.07.2025 17:48 β π 8 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0ACAB - Animal Cops Are eBiscerated
31.07.2025 17:46 β π 10 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0Probably not, actually! I loved Jesus too much at that time, and was incredibly quiet and good.
The devil was clearly seeping through the cracks, but Lil Karla was a polite angel all the other mothers envied. No sass! Only grounded once...for reading *too much.*
It all turned out great, obviously.
From the names alone, I was clearly destined to write for Marvel at some point. Yeesh.
31.07.2025 17:18 β π 5 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0
"The Tri-City Woodland Weekly" newspaper, May 1988. It's a bunch of typed and cut "news articles" pasted together. This page includes obituaries, divorce announcements, and an advice column from "Dear Blabby"
"The Tri-City Woodland Weekly" newspaper, May 1988. It's a bunch of typed and cut "news articles" pasted together. Thid page is cheesy woodland themed classifieds, real estate ads, and a fashion column written by a turtle. Also a list of "Top 10 movies" that are all shitty, early Karla puns.
A list of "Top 10 movies" that are all EXTREMELY shitty, early Karla puns. It's ProtoKarla. (If you can't read this and really want to yell at me, DM me and I will transcribe it for you personally. I'm otherwise too ashamed to type it out again)
...I'm going to go back in time and strangle MYSELF in the cradle #LilKarla
31.07.2025 17:09 β π 8 π 0 π¬ 3 π 0
"The Tri-City Woodland Weekly" newspaper, May 1988. It's a bunch of typed and cut "news articles" pasted together. They mostly appear to be about murders, violent crime, and kidnapping. Also about a fish retiring as mayor, I guess??
I forgot that when I was 11 years I guess I decided to make a cute animal themed newspaper?
It got dark as fuck IMMEDIATELY. #LilKarla
A mysterious manila file...OF MYSTERY!!
Okay...so in the big honking pile of "Shit Karla hasn't gone through in 20 years or more" from my recent organizational spree, I discovered this file of photos, school reports and Little Karla being The Mostβ’ Little Karlaβ’β’
I will try not to overwhelm you with its full glory all at once.
#LilKarla
GOOD BONES!!!
31.07.2025 16:14 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0I WISH TO SEE!!
31.07.2025 16:07 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0Not the first time that's been said, yeah
31.07.2025 16:06 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0...I also found a medium sized mammal knee joint, two small ribs, and an even more suspiciously large vertebrae than the one I found earlier.
Bone Queen gonna Bone!
(FINALLY, a euphemism!
...or is it???)
An open cardboard box full of craft shit
A closed cardboard box full of craft shit BUT IT HAS BEEN TURNED INTO A VINTAGE DELIGHT THROUGH THE MAGIC OF PEEL AND STICK WALLPAPER
Le FinalΓ©: I organized my bones and made more cute boxes (STILL NOT A EUPHEMISM! A SHOCKING LACK OF EUPHEMISMS!)
31.07.2025 15:59 β π 8 π 0 π¬ 5 π 0
When I'm not pranking cybertruck owners, my other hobbies include surviving natural disasters and losing everything I own. I learned to design shirts and silk screen as a way to express myself. If that appeals to you, take a look:
www.etsy.com/listing/4312...
Starting in a few minutes: @perimeterinstitute.ca Public Lecture by the wonderful @apontzen.bsky.social ! You can watch live here: www.youtube.com/live/-J67c0g...
30.07.2025 22:57 β π 126 π 24 π¬ 7 π 1Just Karla bein' Karla!
30.07.2025 22:31 β π 0 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0
Karla in the middle of the desert, witn a perfectly non-criminal bone trident behind her.
a perfectly non-criminal bone trident!!
"Karla. Is this related to that trident you made from..."perfectly non-criminal rib bones you happened to stumble over?" "NOPE. JUST A RANDOM VERTY BOY!"
30.07.2025 22:29 β π 7 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0
A huge pile of assorted craft items. Some are kinda rusty. Don't ask questions.
A vertebrae of a probably not human sitting on Karla's knee. Definitely not human!
My cute fancy boxes (not a euphemism) for storing things.
Finally organizing all my craft supplies into the cute little boxes I made and oh whoops there's a vertebrae there. Huh.
Anyway! Cute boxes
For the PM crowd! Thanks to everyone who has shown up for us so far! π₯Ήπ
30.07.2025 01:06 β π 9 π 5 π¬ 0 π 0OFF WE GOOOOOO
30.07.2025 01:19 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0(...shit. there's the accidental comic pitch right there)
29.07.2025 20:53 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 3 π 0All the katana of Britannia shall be ours!
29.07.2025 20:52 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0Yo, we literally have a sword room AND I've got a stuntman and a proven heist history! We in!
29.07.2025 20:47 β π 3 π 0 π¬ 1 π 0I had to use them for the past couple of years, and the lady at the botanical garden was AMAZED at my cornering skills. I can turn those babies on a DIME!
The big loud back-up beep is still embarrassing though. Boo.
Thank you! π
29.07.2025 17:02 β π 1 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0It's so velvety π
29.07.2025 17:00 β π 2 π 0 π¬ 0 π 0Tbf I actually just yelled at my beloved Stuntdiiick because he threw out a bunch of DEFINITELY expired spices.
"NO! YOU COULD... PROBABLY USE THAT THING YOU'VE NEVER EVEN OPENED FOR 10 YEARS!"
