FoolWearsBlack

POSSIBLE NEW IDIOMS:

sharpen the zig, sharpen the zag

staircase full of petticoat fluffers

chest like a pillow & a face like a wolf

& THAT’S a Bratislava goodbye

one eye on the flapjacks, one eye on the bellhop

g-g-g-g-g-gong it!

blah blah blah & your zipper’s undone

Julius your Caesar 😉

When they’re too close at the checkout line.

Chicken and gravy flavored jellybeans are definitely what your kids want for Easter

I was forced to utilize the double-handed middle finger salute yesterday when an asshat decided not to move when the light turned green and then stared at me in his side mirror while moving super slowly after I honked at him

It worked, btw. He drove off after that 😵‍💫

Watch out. I'm in Reply Guy mode today

It’s a scam. lol

Yes indeed. 😋 🍦

Need a lamp that gives a polyester and sparkling wine kind of vibe.

Who are we? What are we? Where is ball? 😆

What’s your sign?

Is that a thing in Canada?

🤣🤣🤣🤣

#ImNotAwesomeBut I'm not gruesome either

Thanks! 😁😁😁

BRILLIANT! 🤩🤩🤩

#ImNotAwesomeBut "Ful" is better than "some", right?

#ImNotAwesomeBut
I was awesome-adjacent until my last dog died

#ImNotAwesomeBut I can run circles around you

#ImNotAwesomeBut I did stay at a Holiday Inn Express once, so that has to count for something.

#ImNotAwesomeBut I'm okay

a close up of a man 's face with a white line between his eyes and mouth . ALT: a close up of a man 's face with a white line between his eyes and mouth .

#ImNotAwesomeBut King Kong ain't got shit on me.

#ImNotAwesomeBut I'm all that, and then some.

Thanks! 😂😂😬

🤣🤣🤣

#ImNotAwesomeBut I'm working on it!

#ImNotAwesomeBut all my fans don't know that!

#ImNotAwesomeBut I’m pretty close to it! 😜