Aaron Staley

Modern country just tries too hard.

In fact, I would wager that country music stars have more in common with the average Republican congressmen than the people they allegedly "speak to" - they're millionaire trust fund babies leeching money out of people who want to live on a farm, provided they don't have to do anything.

The average modern country artist doesn't even have calluses from playing an instrument, let alone knows how to hold a shovel properly.

Most modern country fans idealize farm life, but would run screaming for the suburbs if they ever had to drink well water or walk downwind of a cattle pasture.

Modern country music talks about old trucks, dusty roads and hay bales, but makes no mention of the backbreaking labor, narrow economic margins, and crushing debt the average small farmer has to endure.

But now it's all flag-waving wrapped up in metaphors about farm life, sung to people who haven't the slightest fucking clue where their meat, dairy, and produce comes from

The problem with modern country is that it tries too hard.

Back in the 60s and 70s Wynette, Kristofferson, and Jones were singing about divorce, hangovers, and suicide - which are topics the average rural population can relate to.

Me on May 1st: Happy Beltane!

Also, me on May 1st: SEIZE THE MEANS OF PRODUCTION. WORKERS OF THE WORLD UNITE!

The problem with catering to the stupid is they feel entitled to everyone's time, attention, and energy.

And get hella upset when they're told no.

The demographic that the mass media caters to can't walk and chew gum at the same time.

If the Pope died on Easter, does that mean he'll be back in a couple days?

I hate how every time I wait for the other shoe to drop it always fucking does.

The road to fascism is paved with people telling you that you're overreacting.

If I created a franchise as successful as Harry Potter, the most controversial thing I would say is a sudden revelation that I'm responsible for a good 60% of the franchise fan-fic porn available on the Internet.

I'm waiting for one of those millionaire tourism vanity rockets to explode and aerosolize Tom Cruise over southwestern Arizona.

Reducing Cognitive Load is my term for day drinking.

Just had my legs waxed.

It was a complete rip-off.

To expand on my last post:

Maintaining friendships using social media is as low effort and impersonal as getting a birthday card from your dentist.

I'm starting to feel like I'm the only one putting energy into maintaining friendships again.

With the exception of one friend who reached out to me last month, I've had to initiate every conversation with my friends.

Thanks for confirming that I'm no one's first choice.

Any "hands free" device needs to have a manual interface as well.

I'm tired of flailing my wet hands at a towel dispenser like Kermit the Frog.

There is a minority group that I feel is responsible for a majority of the problems I have.

They're called congressmen.

I would like to thank Elon for proving that the only difference between a billionaire and the guy who rants on a subway platform while masturbating is a billion dollars.

Wealth really does turn insanity into eccentricity.

Would not expect anything more from the man whose career peaked with House 2: The Second Story.

Lord grant me the confidence of a local band on social media announcing "big things soon!"

My problem with the new ChatGPT engine is I told it to make me a picture of a big titty goth girl who's dummy thicc and they said my request violated their usage policy.

I'm sorry, ChatGPT, I thought you were world-changing technology.

Bold of you to assume we're going to have elections in the future.

I love how the same people who will take a random pill they found on the ground at a music festival are against vaccines because "no one knows what's in them".

It's hard to heal and grow when you're in an environment filled with glorified livestock that does nothing more than feed, fuck, and fling shit at others.

Every time I have Jesus take the wheel, I keep forgetting that he doesn't know how to drive.