My house smells like pot*.

*Roast

“Before Watchmen: Silk Spectre” #1 Writer - Darwyn Cooke Artist - Amanda Connor

WTF WHY AREN’T YOU WATCHING ACTORS NEED YOUR ADORATION

Every time I take a sip of Bushmills Whiskey a small part of me is transported back to my first sip as a wee lad stealing sips from older members of that side of the family and it's such a lovingly dangerous memory it feels like home

SAG-AFTRA: actors need more awards they don’t get enough recognition

everybody: huh what about the Oscars, the Emmy’s, the Golden Globes, the Baftas, the People’s Choice, the

SAG-AFTRA: shut the fuck up . The Actor Awards . Tonight at 7pm on Netflix . tune in. or an actor will cry or something idk

haha

😬

heyooooooo

I just wish celebrities would like me for me

I'm a lot like Brendan Fraser in Encino Man in that I too break into museums and try to start a fire after learning distressing truths

aussies: what

the fuckery is persisting like it's in competition with itself

Shut the fuck up the Sesame Street pinball number video is on

Coworker: how are you?

Me: I'm fairly confident today is Wednesday, so okay I guess

There is an alarmingly small amount of clocks featured on TikTok

spending a sunday with a cat sleeping in your lap is great for many ailments

ME: Here in Kansas we have a chance to see hungry vultures get their fill.

MY WAYWARD SON: What do they eat?

😂

Capital !

a spice rack with a little clock on it somebody write that down

I bought a houseplant to learn responsibility. It died immediately. Honestly, a huge relief for both of us.

Wish I had a country estate to be banished to for the rest of the season

perfectly peppered reply 😝

Occupant was my father's name. Call me Current Resident.

*Willie Nelson voice* oh damn fuck me

the odds of me killing a plastic plant are low but not impossible

so, kinda like purgatory ?

that one won’t curry me any favors or should i say flavors ha (or should i just shut up yeah imma shut up)

me: wow it’s march 1st where did the time go

you: it’s on the spice rack. where it always is

me: what

This Saturn in Aries Transit Is Going to Light Your World on Fire But that doesn’t have to be a bad thing! Seriously.

It's happening people

www.thecut.com/article/satu...