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Eric Schmidt

@talkingschmidt.bsky.social

Standup. Actor. Voice Actor. Comedy seen on Cracked, in the Washington Post and Chicago Tribune. Voice heard in ads for Grubhub, Natty Light and OneWheel. Former Letterman Page. Award nominated screenwriter. Live Snakes at the Gutter in Williamsburg

1,375 Followers  |  579 Following  |  301 Posts  |  Joined: 01.07.2023
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Posts by Eric Schmidt (@talkingschmidt.bsky.social)

β€œWe gotta go kill their oppressive religious right wing leaders”
-American and Israeli oppressive religious right wing leaders

01.03.2026 17:43 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

If they didn’t want to get hit by snowballs, they shouldn’t have dressed like that

25.02.2026 01:43 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 1    πŸ“Œ 0

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Logo (Early Draft)

20.02.2026 02:10 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Kid Rock makes music for people who can’t figure out how to use chopsticks

12.02.2026 01:43 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

It’s gotta be weird for country club republicans to pretend to like Kid Rock while already pretending to like Donald Trump

10.02.2026 21:06 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I keep getting profiled because of my appearance. People assume I watched the Kid Rock halftime show. I haven’t listened to Kid Rock since I was in 8th grade which is the only age it’s appropriate to be a fan of his

10.02.2026 20:37 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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Turning Point USA halftime show

06.02.2026 19:55 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Government officials killed a white guy with a legally concealed firearm. I feel like this is the kind of thing white guys with legally concealed firearms would be mad about if they hadn’t become worthless pawns of the state

25.01.2026 17:14 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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Inviting friends to a Trump rally

22.01.2026 17:51 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I know what he can do to try to turn her straight

17.01.2026 19:39 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Oh, you’ll know I’m American. I’m overweight and unfashionable.

17.01.2026 19:34 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Oh great now Germany is the good guys and we’re the bad guys

15.01.2026 06:03 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

War in Venezuela wasn’t enough. Now he’s ramping up his war on America

14.01.2026 05:21 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

They gotta say they’re going and bail last minute so Trump doesn’t have time to pack the chairs with morons and jagoffs

09.01.2026 18:35 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Abolish ICE

07.01.2026 20:22 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Looks like young JD Vance time travelled to try to stop him

05.01.2026 16:55 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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America walking into 2026

04.01.2026 07:13 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

I don’t think he’ll win the 2026 FIFA Peace Prize

03.01.2026 18:34 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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Trump criticizing Bush for Iraq

03.01.2026 16:10 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Trump is getting in on the early 2000s nostalgia by starting an unnecessary war

03.01.2026 15:52 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

With this aggressive military action, Trump is hoping to prove he’s more than just a pedophile

03.01.2026 15:30 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Hope it knocked him back to being progressive

13.11.2025 19:06 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Worst thing about ANTIFA meetings is all the vegan pizza

16.10.2025 18:46 β€” πŸ‘ 4    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

He’s way too old to still be a Senator. He should be at home in an urn

16.10.2025 17:15 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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In Mean Streets, Robert De Niro looks like he’s about to sing Smooth with Carlos Santana

15.10.2025 03:45 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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Here’s a proposed Turning Point USA β€œall-American” halftime show act

11.10.2025 15:32 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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As a trend-noticer, I’ve noticed the worst things tend to happen under Republican presidents

11.10.2025 15:17 β€” πŸ‘ 3    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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I started playing pickleball cuz I’m worried about my weight

09.10.2025 20:36 β€” πŸ‘ 2    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0
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Day jobs suck

08.10.2025 14:43 β€” πŸ‘ 1    πŸ” 1    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0

Both parties want to go back to the 50s. Liberals want to go back to taxing the rich to provide a better social safety net and republicans just want the racism

08.10.2025 13:43 β€” πŸ‘ 0    πŸ” 0    πŸ’¬ 0    πŸ“Œ 0