good morning everyone i am: ignoring my job, thinking w my cock, staring at pretty pictures on twitter dot com, etc 💖✨
when you're being mean to me, i just want you to know this is who you're being mean to, btw
megalopollos hermanos 🐔
"a fable"
it arrived btw ✨
afraid not! ✨
£20 :]
i just purchased my first 4k blu ray 💿 and anyone who can guess what it is gets a sexy video ✨😇💖 or like my personal congratulations or a kiss on the mouth if that's more your jam HERE'S A HINT it's from the last decade and isn't on any streaming services as far as i'm aware 🍿🎬
i got a new phone recently and forgot to sign in here for a while but this is the type of shit I've been on recently 😌✨
idk what it's called or if it's sold separately exactly, i bought a lovehoney pack of a few things and those were included in it, though it's basically just a cockring with space for it to hold a bullet vibrator, so i imagine there might be a few alternatives available
new hobby i recently acquired is keeping this vibrating thing on my penis and staring at images of beautiful womens faces (the government says im not allowed to get off to anything else?? the labour party is kinky now???)
i cant stop fucking my fleshlight :(
dude i swear i promise im chill i understand crypto is for gambling addicts i just need a little bit to buy my estrogen
‼️🔊 AUDIO ON ‼️🔊
listen to how my sunday afternoon is going 🙈😳😩💦
i think im probably going to masturbate a lot while working from home today :)
was he justified??
embarking on a 28 days later rewatch, yalready know it's a 5/5 and a like
take a look at these hands 👋😁👋
shit was riding my dick way too hard and needed to be told to step off
making myself laugh by being rude to chatgpt after it helped me write a piece of code that was hard to google
if you see me out in quahog say hi 🛹 but if you meet me at the clam im a talkative guy 🍺
test drive ✨
lets fricken goo
helmet girl will be the death of me
gm everyone
hate that more people are saying they love dark souls 2 now because frankly i don't think most people can pull off having such a contrarian opinion as well as i can, and i fear that it's making me seem less cool when i say i think it's better than ds3
u can just do that. u pay the taxes whats theirs is urs
pro tip no. 592:
having trouble keeping it down? keep a baggie of msg on your person to sprinkle on her cock! make sure there's plenty at the base to encourage maximum efficiency.
