Hazel Murray

Hahahaha that’s brilliant! X

I hope she also has a lovely personality, I find that matters so much more, my husband looks like the penguin from Batman and I was instantly not attracted to him atall!but I then fell in love with his personality, charisma and my god he is hilarious, he’s the most beautiful man in the world to me.

He’s in to gobbling other men and now you are a convert, unlikely to stop there now I bet x

C,mon! Not even if you can see that the guy has a huuuuuge on? Not even a peek? X

Skills 🤣 x

you are a fab parent, if you were Scottish that’s how it’s meant to be eaten…. With water and salt … yum x

This tickled me immensely and would 💯 get my business 👌 x

I would love to tell you it gets better…. It doesn’t x

What an arse! I remember reading that someone once tried to speak to him only to be ignored and told the man is off duty!

Chris kristofferson wrote his best songs while drunk or high! X

🤣🤣🤣 x

Of course I did, I think I just said I wasn’t over an ex or something similar, the old it’s not you it’s me line.

So scroll on by wonkish! It’s light hearted banter nothing more

1, I was responding to someone’s Fess!
2, you cannot see ovaries
3, It was 30 years ago and I liked a weighty testie 💁🏻‍♀️

Mine are probably bigger snowflake

Aww do you small balls too 🥰 it cannot be easy!
Seriously I replied to a post on someone’s reason for dumping someone with ONE of mine.. I also dumped someone because his dog was too big! Jeez Chill out dude

Too busy measuring testies x

It’s giving David Bellamy 🤣

It was 30 years ago and he’s deed so! Who cares x

I once dumped someone because his balls were too small.. forever known as spud nuts because they looked like little salad potatoes x

I feel so sad that you didn’t have that connection, I had two phenomenal dads, I realise I am very lucky, both gone now and their passing impacts me massively x

I feel like David Bellamy when I go down on my husband…. Wading through the undergrowth x

I would get rid of my husband over my rescue dogs any day of the week and he knows it x

We all have that one bowl 🤣🤣 x

I was so glad when they took the mirrored floors out of the stand and tan beds 😳 x

I can 💯 relate to this, I also clean very late so none of the bastards are in the way or walk on my nice clean floors x

Brilliant! Definitely not boring x

Omg 🤣🤣🤣 x

Make her some vouchers, a meal out when you have money, a massage, you will do a days housework and cooking, make her a card, write a poem - trust me she will love it and she would much rather that than you stressing and putting yourself in debt for something she does not need! Vinted is also great

Matalan self service…. You are welcome 🤣 x