Ian Mcdonald

Dog broken. Send help.

Americans who pronounce "Plato" as "play-dough"

.....to the gulag.

Ticking the box on my advent calendar of:

"days until a cybertruck on autopilot laterally bisects a child at a pedestrian crossing while it's driver is asleep at the wheel after staying awake until three AM tweeting #pleaselookatmeElon"

My greatest contribution to society will be "silent apples"

They're exactly like regular apples but they make absolutely zero noise when they're eaten. No crunching. No slurping. Nothing.

You're welcome.

I cannot understand why nobody has made this comparison yet.

Elon musk is truly a repressed 13 year old. This confirms it.

Don't bury him. Send the body over to Cambodia and just let them do what they want.

What saddens me is the knowledge that if Netenyahu actually commits to a cease-fire of any sort, even after this wholesale slaughter, so much of the western media will applaud him as some kind of noble statesman for doing it.

Excuse me while i choke on my fucking scorn.

#FreePalestine

When i take over the world, i think i will send anyone who enjoys ASMR to the gulags.

I don't think that's too extreme.

I wonder how many dead Palestinians it takes before the "wrong on both sides" crowd realise how fucking monstrous that attitude is.

So far, hasn't happened....

Well this one hurts. God fucking damn it.

"in the house of a rich man, there is nowhere to spit but his face"

- Thomas Jefferson....probably.

I really don't like the world sometimes.

Bæ bæ Bjarni. Bæ bæ.

#FreePalestine

*Russell Quaid even.

Apparently i am Icelandic Dennis Quaid....

Post your bluesky name and bio into AI and see what it makes of it.

Which AI generator do you use for these? I'm a complete noob at this.

Once your brain sees the Taylor swift tour not as "Eras" but as "Arse" there's no going back.

I like to convince myself that my dog understands that me removing her eye-boogers is a sign of love and affection, and not some terrible assault.

I just breathed in wrongly and spent 5 minutes coughing my lungs out because i accidentally inhaled a tiny bit of saliva.

How in the hell have we survived this long as a species if that's all it takes to end us?

I am nothing of the sort, but if you think Biden gives a single runny shit about Palestine then i have a bridge to sell you.

And Biden promptly forgot what Palestine was, before walking off the stage backwards.

I spend my free time defacing Volvo cars by changing the names to "Vulva"

It's simple, wholesome fun.

What's the difference between Kevin McCarthy and a misbehaving puppy?

Kevin McCarthy isn't allowed back in the house anymore.

Thankyou. I'm here all week.

October is of course a scary month. But given that every month is now scary due to the world being on fire, i propose we celebrate Halloween all-year-round!

Ég velti því oft fyrir mér hvaða land Ísland gæti verið ef það stæði undir veggspjöldum ferðaþjónustunnar.

Svo hugsa ég um Bjarna Ben og hjartað í mér sökkar.