Soft fists insist on heaving the needles

I gotta get someone to read this at Ambly's and my 20th anniversary party

If you think "everyone's a little bit Autistic", maybe ask yourself why you keep hanging out with Autistic people?

Woo yourself. Romance yourself. Take yourself on dates. Buy yourself presents. Write yourself love notes. Stare lovingly into the mirror and stroke your own face while whispering sweet nothings.

If you can do it, you who have been so critical of yourself, why couldn't someone else?

Tweet by Joyce Carol Oates: "wherever he goes, he wants to leave"--that's because when he gets there, he has brought his own self along; & whatever club he's invited to join has been devalued by the invitation. QT of @avidreader1000 Wherever he goes, he wants to leave: SA, Canada, ultimately the U.S. in the long run, based on his behavior. This also includes Earth. A continuous disavowal of your home is odd, to say the least. He seems to have no c...

“whatever club he’s invited to join has been devalued by the invitation”

Yeah that is fair! They fuckin do. I'm just so enculturated -- Sesame Street had me saying Zee as a pre-schooler.

Sorry! I just read it as a name, and that's how the people who coined the name pronounce it. Like, I'm not gonna say "Jay Zed" or "La-Zed-Boy"

Girl dinner, when it's been awhile
I'm plating up in style tonight
Oh ease maker
You fast breaker
Whatever you're serving, I'll eat with delight

Two cheeses, olives & a pear
There's not a lot to spare, to eat
We're after the same carton's end
Dishing up at 10
My charcuterie friend
Girl dinner & me

Saw a tweet referring to MTG and immediately thought “Megan Thee Galleon” which is I guess a pirate themed Megan Thee Stallion drag act

Ur a dad now

Gritty realist Melbourne Cup party where you win a glue stick if your sweepstakes horse dies #NupToTheCup

Performative leftist dude who happily goes to his work’s Melbourne Cup party but insists on calling it the Naarm Cup

a friend leant me a game console thing and i have learned two things: 1. kirby is great and i love his little game, and 2. i do not care for this mario character.

I have a very straightforward relationship to my birthday: I love it and everyone should tell me they love me. I even love it when friends sing happy birthday to me. But I think there is a grasping, scared child part of me that is fuelling that love. I try to give her what she wants

A man holding up a Kapital bandana.

A construction worker wearing a bandana.

If you live in a major city, you may have noticed more people wearing bandanas around their neck, as the accessory has made a small comeback. Typically made from cotton, the bandana — distinct from the ascot — has a long history in working class aesthetics, as it serves a practical function.

The result: a display inspired by our lush springtime Hallowe'en. It was a rushed effort in the end but something to build on next year. It's storming outside, incidentally.

I ❤️ meeting new people & having the fact that both my parents are 💀 come up & then they say "oh wow, that's a lot of trauma!" & then they look at me like how are you still walking around like a normal person?

Cause yeah, that's a lot of trauma! How am I still walking around like a normal person??

when Tom Holland and Zendaya get married, he should take her last name and become Tom

I hope planner organisers know that every time I look at a week-to-an-opening layout and you've given Saturday and Sunday half the space as the other days, I think "gross" and walk away.

What kind of hustle-and-grind productivity ghouls are you?

I don't even want to listen to a human read it

Supporting the private school industrial complex!!

It looks like the app, which I've been using for ages. I saw one complaint that was "it's only good if you're in a capital city amd want to know what the temperature is." And i was like, is that not 80% of their user base?

Oh no, I got that -- i mean who's being defended by Nazi sympathisers currently, that reminded you of the asshole?

Wait, what? Who's dressing up as an SS officer?

We have a "Report phishing email" button in Outlook that we gotta press when we get one, real or not.

I've never had a real phishing email at my work address

Text: A computer can never be horny, therefore a computer can never make art

a jazz club named "Club Gombe" with a chimpanzee band going nuts on stage and more chimps hooting and hollering at the tables. one empty table has a card on it reading "reserved for Jane Goodall"

BRAND NEW Far Side from Gary Larson just dropped

Tawny frogmouth named 2025 Australian bird of the year winner Perennial runner up finally claims the crown in the biennial Guardian/BirdLife Australia poll, ahead of Baudin’s black cockatoo and gang-gang cockatoo

Congrats to the Tawny Frogmouth!

www.theguardian.com/environment/...

Oh what you love and support each other and feel proud for their achievements and they have a positive influence on your life? Sucker. If your pink bits don't smash it's not worth it.

As I walked down the George St under the plane trees, chants around me interrupted by coughs, I realised urban planners had invented non-lethal anti-protest weapons before the police could