Matt Ortile (or-TEE-lay)

No cuomo (said while thinking abt “no homo”)

had a busy week but this kind of only-in-New York marathon of events, shows, parties, dinner reservations, et al. never gets old even after 11 years of living here :)

It Should Not Be This Hard to Find an Agent Except...... (And an Excerpt)

It should not be this hard to find an agent, right??????

this!!!

ok???

I love this newsletter for writers: @katemckean.bsky.social . One of my fav reads in my email.

Immigrant Strong: May 2025 My Electric Lit essay, the newsletter turns six, and my favorite memoir of the year

may issue of Immigrant Strong, my free monthly newsletter, is out! includes an essay i published this month, my favorite memoir of the year so far, and more writing and interviews with immigrant writers open.substack.com/pub/immigran...

need a Costco-sized bag of these to get me through this day

:(

good morning blue sky pls tell me your favorite people to follow that make this place feel like golden age tw*tt*r i miss the shitposts

wow i stop taking Zyrtec for one day and suddenly I’m clogged up like a middle manager’s email inbox after a week of PTO this sucks

Come on New York

Prove to the world that you are as cool as you incessantly claim you are

Or just admit you're an overpriced version of Jersey City

We're now 8 points away from sending Andrew Cuomo back to the suburbs.

i meant teaching!!! tell ur friends

also btw while I’m here: heads up that I’m gonna start writing classes again, watch this space ❤️

Do this bsky.app/profile/sver...

different editors have different styles but trust me when I say this is one thing we all agree on!! those edits on page 1 may change once the editor gets to page 3—leave the draft alone until it comes back to you

take a break! watch some TV, make a meal, call a friend, touch seaweed, SOMETHING ELSE

I’ve been an editor for 11 years and my god I still have to say this once a month!!

writers— please please PLEASE do not resolve your editor’s notes in the Google Doc until they tell you it is your turn to review and address!! I promise you they will tell you when it’s your move

A Fond Farewell To Polygon, From The People Who Worked There - Aftermath "It was a good website. I doubt I'll ever find a place like it for the rest of my career"

“Websites are their people; laying off the majority of a site’s staff is akin to molting skin and bones – and keeping only a name. So while Polygon persists, we still feel like now is an appropriate time to give former staff a chance to eulogize what was.” Read: aftermath.site/polygon-vox-...

need an app that lets me post on here and tweet on the other website simultaneously

Are you an American living in Ireland? Or perhaps you know an American who has moved to Ireland? I’d love to interview you for a story on Condé Nast Traveler — please reply below!

Tweet from furby Hancock: Waiter: so how is everything? Me: great! Waiter: (disgusted) even war?

being on bluesky

Ballet dancers with Boston Ballet recreating the viral finger-hold interview moment from the Wicked press tour, costumed as Elphaba and Glinda from Wicked.

Need everyone to know that for a final performance of Boston Ballet's Nutcracker, they costumed the party scene dolls as Elphaba and Glinda and even included the viral finger-hold moment. (Screenshot because it won't show the preview, but watch the IG video! Link: www.instagram.com/reel/DEP8Rsx... )

Oh shit my book comes out this year!

Andy Cohen is still screaming about Eric Adams's indictments, I love this, happy new year everyone!!!

those gay raunchy holiday copypastas are sacred and must be handed down generation to generation

Without downloading any new pics, what's your energy going into 2025?

Onions

I want to talk about how I’m excited to teach parallelization in my Statistical Computing course, but I think most of my followers are here because of Onions. So here he is.

ONIONS

Huge night here at NYU. An undergrad trying to fix their grade accidentally discovered how to email 11,000 instructors on a secret group email list, unifying the faculty like no one before. I have hundreds of email replies in my inbox. And apparently Onions, the puppy, has just been granted tenure.