Willy Wonka: Werewolf Hunter

Episode two of #WelcomeToDerry is available to stream on Sky now! 🎈

You can’t even open Elmo’s app without your “For You” feed being filled with porn.

You literally can’t open Twitter in public.

I like to wait until a season of a show ends before I watch it (box sets have killed weekly episodic viewing for me), but Welcome to Derry is testing my resolve…

#WelcomeToDerry // #ItWelcomeToDerry

Imagine a Chucky/Art the Clown crossover movie. Go on… imagine it!

That shit would be fun!

#ChildsPlay // #Terrifier // #Chucky // #ArtTheClown

That… was fucking beautiful!

And Nick Pope! Multiple saves and an assist!! Not many keepers can say that!

#NUFC

Not a clue mate… refuse to watch it. Not exactly a fan of the royals. But Oscar nominated, so must have been something in her performance.

Nah man, she’s done loads since. She was Oscar nominated just a couple of year ago for playing Princess Diana.

Ah yeah, I wasn’t slating the movie. I enjoyed it. It just took a left turn with Cthulhu and escalated quickly.

Underwater was her last movie?

Was awake at 3am and thanks to a Facebook post I discovered and watched the Kristen Stewart movie, Underwater.

What started as a survival movie ended with - and sorry for spoilers - motherfucking Cthulhu!

Watching #TheSubstance. The most disgusting part about this film is Dennis Quaid eating those damn prawns 🤢

I’m only ten minutes into #YourHost, and I hope this James cockwomble dies a horrible, slow, violent death.

The CGI unicorn in Death of a Unicorn is actually worse than the CGI boar in The Strangers: Chapter 2.

My old dog once found a pine cone literally five yards from our front door. She picked it up and carried it in her mouth for the entire walk. When we got home she dropped it right where she found it. Next walk she went to get it and it was gone.

She checked every single time we went out after that.

Sex Education was a good show until they all stopped shagging.

Anybody that actually enjoyed #TheStrangersChapter2 clearly just started watching movies last week.

Just remembered that time about thirty year ago when the late great Pavel Srnicek nicked a particularly nice Parker pen off me.

#NUFC // #PavelIsAGeordie

Just watched #HalloweenKills.

At the end, Laurie phones Karen and Michael answers the phone.

How does he know how to work an iPhone? He’s been in an asylum since 1978.

People who send seven texts when only one will suffice… why are you the way you are? 🤷‍♂️

Ah dude, that would have been awesome! I didn’t get to see them until later in Birmingham and Newcastle, but they just blew everyone away!

What do you think of Emily?

Well, mostly they were supporting, or were on like an awards tour. They did an NME Awards tour with Andrew WK, and I saw them support Linkin Park and a couple of other bands. But admittedly, they had some banging tunes.

Yeah, never seen that. Baseball movies don’t do well here in the UK.

Hmm, there’s bound to be loads of stories about how it happened so I wouldn’t put too much faith in it (as much as I hope it’s true).

Whatever happened, he deserved worse.

Man, when I think how many times I saw him and LosyProphets live… scary shit, man!

Mate, I’ve had three of them… one licked me continuously! In the words of Bruce Willis, I now believe he just saw me as a “Meat popsicle”!

What if dogs lick us because they know we have bones inside us and they want them?

Tonight’s viewing:

The Ritual // Dir. David Bruckner (2017)

Evil nonce Ian Watkins murdered in prison.

Good!

I hope to god the cunt suffered an agonising, slow death. Piece of shit.

A toast to his killer!

That’s a banger of a poster…

#NowWatching Good Boy.

Give Indy ALL the treats!