Charlie 🇵🇸

writing it "f*ck" sickens me. a coward's curse. say fuck or find a different word. get that nasty starfish asshole out of my sight

applying to a job at the Economist with a photo of my own flayed face to see what they can tell about my personality

[during sex] jay graydon's famous guitar solo on steely dan's "Peg" was the result of a long and difficult process, donald and walter rejected solos from seven other guitarists before Graydon was brought in and nailed it

Political violence is bad but me and my mates need to set fire to this hotel because it contains people I don’t know personally but don’t like the idea of. Political violence is bad but I support the right of a country to kill hundreds of thousands of civilians because I’ve deemed them terrorists

go home yankee

Melanie Off

David Cameron’s definitely 100% real unedited driving licence

once my ID is verified it’s time to pap my pud

Barney Ronay’s granddad (Wehrmacht 44. Infanterie-Division) liquidates another house of Soviet women and children on the road to Stalingrad (1942, colourised)

how are there people on here failing the eurovision boycott, fuck me, beyond belief

zack polanski approvingly retweeting that unhinged biblical corbyn thread jk rowling made

is this your king??

“you gotta be fuckin’ kidding” — Thomas the Apostle

our lord and saviour jesus christ looking vengeful as he bursts through the chest of that one fella from the thing (1982)

HE IS RISEN 🙏✝️🤲

white dog shit never left us, we just spend too much time glued to our screens to look out for it

*Extremely Bruce Springsteen voice:

blackthorn in bloom along motorway verges >>>

worst part is I can’t even ask Mr Xi to go ahead and launch the dongfengs because the PRC is one of the worst offenders for time shenanigans

does capital not rob enough from you that every six months you willingly hand over even the sun in the sky

standup comedian Gul Madred from Chain of Command torturing Captain Picard with yet another attempt at his dire “how many lights are there” routine

you, the virgin Gul Madred, insisting it’s 5pm

vs. me, the chad Picard, saying it is, in fact, 4

peter hitchens staring slightly derangedly at an old clock like it’s the ark of the covenant

me every day for the next six months btw. I do not respect the loathsome DST and I never will

A set of jangling keys

logo for Marvel Studios: Avengers Doomsday

A set of jangling keys will return in "AVENGERS: DOOMSDAY"

she may be snivelling and right wing etc but benefit of the doubt

hahahah of course it’s all snivelling right wing toady cunts, plus claudia winkleman for some reason

nice argument, however I have already presented you as the hubristic techbro recluse Dexter and myself as the deft saboteur Dee Dee

dead leaves covered in what appear to be relatively fresh deer droppings. shiny, olive-black. the deer didn’t even bag them and put them in a bin

plus would be very grateful if any deer experts can tell me who did these poopies

dead leaves cut a path through a woodland floor carpeted in green by leaves of wild garlic shooting up from the ground

enjoy this carpet of woodland wild garlic while you think about all the cruel and unusual punishments your favourite Labour MPs deserve

Today, mothers and fathers in Gaza are mourning their children because governments across the world did not deem their lives worthy of protection.

Amazing things happening to language and meaning over at @theguardian.com